Old Lady
by skellington13
Summary: I’m twenty four! I’m not ready to be tied to one person, no matter how much I might love him.” “You’re acting like being an old lady would be the end of the world.” He groaned, moving his hands back to my hair and pulling me up. Juice/OC M for swearing
1. Chapter 1

_This is a new series i'm working on. i think i'm gonna do it as one chapter for every episode. This first chapter started as a one shot but i think it's just gonna be an introduction to the character._

_Please read and review. I don't own the characters that you recognise.  
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"Mika! Hey, Mika, can I talk to you for a minute?"

I looked up from the text message I was sending and smiled at the tall, handsome man who'd stopped beside the bench I was sitting on.

"Johnny? I wasn't expecting to see you until tonight." I frowned slightly when he didn't return my smile. He sat next to me but left a few inches between our bodies and began twiddling his thumbs. My frown deepened as I watched him glance around before gazing at me. Instead of meeting my eyes, he kept his gaze just above, on my forehead.

"I've been thinking a lot, since I asked you out last week and I, uh… I don't think it's a good idea. I'm just… I'm not good enough for you."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

It was a fair question. I was a waitress by day and a bar tender by night. Johnny was an up and coming lawyer at the only big firm in Charming. He made five times what I did and he came from a family of high fliers, one of the families that Charming was oh so proud to have raised. Unlike my family… some people saw us as Charming royalty and others regarded us as scum.

Johnny was shaking his head and looking around uneasily.

"You're wrong. I don't deserve you. I couldn't keep up with you if I tried. You're too much of a woman for me."

I looked at him as he rushed through his words, understanding suddenly dawning on me. I tilted my head and surveyed the street in front of me.

Charming was the perfect picture of small town living. The store fronts were neat and tidy, colourful and inviting. The streets were clean and looked after and the people were, usually, polite and friendly. It was a town taken straight from a 1950s sitcom.

The only dark cloud on the town's reputation was the group of men sitting across the street, watching my conversation with barely concealed glee. There were only three of them today, dressed in their baggy jeans and their leather vests. They were parked outside the new café, leaning on their bikes and blowing smoke in the air as they watched.

"Look, Mika, I gotta go. I'm sorry… okay."

"Don't worry about it Johnny." I sighed. "I'll make sure they know that you held up your end of the bargain."

The relief on his face was nauseating and I shook my head as I slouched away.

I glared at the bikers as I strode towards them, hating them for their relaxed positions and their amused and satisfied expressions.

"Where is he?"

"You're boy's gonna make a fine lawyer some day, running away from his problems and taking the first bribe he's offered." Tig commented. Jax and Opie chuckled to themselves.

"Where is he?" I repeated, looking around for his bike.

"You ready to give up and let him ink you?" Jax asked with an amused grin. "I'm getting a little tired of chasing off the other boys. I feel like your big brother."

"You are my big brother, jack ass." I glared as fiercely as I could. "Now where the fuck is that no good, dumb ass prick?"

"He's at the shop. You know he ain't got the balls to come here himself. He knows you'd eat him for breakfast." Tig smirked. "What you need is a real man, honey."

"Oh yeah, know any?" I asked flatly.

I turned my back and started to walk away before Jax grabbed my wrist and tugged me towards him.

"Come on, I'll give you a ride to the shop and you can throw you're hissy fit there."

"Screw you, asshole." I snapped as I climbed on to the back of his bike.

This was the third time in a month I'd ended up in this position, I mused. And it was all that baldy headed bastard's fault. He just kept hacking my emails and my phone… it didn't help that the entire club thought it was hilarious to mess with me.

Three dates… three times I'd been dumped before we even got started. I'm not sure what exactly he was threatening them with… hell, I'm not sure it was even him doing the threatening. He was pretty close with Happy and the taller man was a lot more menacing than he was.

Either way, this was one push too far. I knew he was stubborn. I knew he had a jealous streak a mile wide and I knew that the others didn't take too well to me 'messing around' with other guys but screw 'em all. I wasn't about to let him tie me down for the rest of my life while he got to roam the streets and nail whatever tail he wants.

Teller Morrow Auto was buzzing with people as I climbed off the back of Jax's bike. Jax gave me a one fingered salute that I promptly returned, before heading inside. Opie stood next to me for a few seconds, leaning down to mutter in my ear not to kill him, they needed him. Tig wandered off, shouting at the top of his voice about how fucking hot it was out here.

I spied him inside, standing with Chibs and the Prospect beside a black Chevy. I stood at the door, crossing my arms across my chest and tapped my foot on the ground until I caught their attention. I saw his eyes widen and his mouth form a little O shape as he looked at me. Chibs and Half Sack looked between us before leaving, amused grins playing across their faces. Sadistic bastards.

"Don't hurt him too much, love. We might need 'im one of these days."

I glared at Chibs as he left before storming across the garage to him.

"Hey baby." He smirked. "Where's your date?"

"You think you're funny, Carlos?" He scowled at the name and I smirked.

"Oh come on, Mika, the guy was a total douche. Besides, he called Gemma a biker whore on the phone." His dark eyes were wide and pleading and I bit my tongue, hard, to keep from telling him how adorable he was. And okay, if I'd heard him saying that about my mom I'd have decked him myself. But that wasn't the point.

"You can't keep doing this, Juice. It's not fair." I told him as I hoisted myself onto the car. He walked slowly towards me, placing his hands on my knees and pushing them apart, moving closer to my body. For reasons I couldn't fathom, I didn't push him away. In fact, I briefly tightened my legs against his waist and tried to ignore his smirk.

"I'm gonna keep doing it for as long as you're holding out. You bring those assholes round, I'm gonna get rid of them. I ain't gonna stop and I ain't gonna apologise."

I sighed and rested my head on his shoulder. The leather of his cut was cool against my forehead and his hands came up to tangle in my hair, pulling it out of its ponytail and separating the strands slowly.

"Why are you doing this?" I asked softly, knowing I was going to get the same response I got every time I asked the question.

"Why are _you_ doing this?" He retorted. "Why can't you just accept that you're my old lady? Why can't you just get the god damn tat?" He slid his fingers beneath my shirt and brushed them against the skin of my hip bone, the spot he wanted my tattoo. I shuddered slightly as he repeated the motion twice before tugging his hand away and looking him in the eye.

"I'm not my mom, Juice! I'm not gonna turn into a battle scared woman who doesn't mind that her husband is fucking anything that moves every time he goes on a run. I'm twenty four! I'm not ready to be tied to one person, no matter how much I might love him."

"You're acting like being an old lady would be the end of the world." He groaned, moving his hands back to my hair and pulling me up so that I was looking at him. "Would it really be so bad?"

"Yes! Seriously, just listen to me okay. I get tattooed and if we ever break up no guy in this town will ever touch me. Ever. Because all they'll see is a damn crow and they'll automatically know I 'belonged' to a son and who wants to risk their life for a chick, huh?"

"You're damn right they'll never touch you." He scowled briefly before grinning. "Look, baby, you act like becoming your mom is such a bad thing… your mom is the strongest person I've ever met. She fuckin runs this place. She's a straight up bad ass. That's not a bad thing."

"I know it isn't… but I'm not my mom, Juice. The first time you came home smelling like some sweet butt, we'd be over. And I'd be alone for the rest of my life."

"You're already planning my affair! Jesus Michaela, you're so sure I'm gonna screw up! I have never cheated on you! Never. You're so fucking sure I'm gonna cheat on you… I could be faithful."

"Sure you could." I drawled. "When the rest of the guys are screwing the bimbos and Tig's harassing you to do the same you're just gonna sit there and shake your head and say no, thanks, I've a wife at home?"

He glared at me, pushing himself away from me and pacing. "Why do you always gotta do that? You always gotta make things seem so much worse than they already are. Can't we just cross that road when we come to it?"

"You just don't get it, do you? If we break up you'll have a hundred sluts ready to help you get over me, I get no one. Not a single guy."

He rolled his eyes before leaning towards me. I pushed myself back as far as I could and shook my head. "If the guy isn't willing to go up against the club for you then he's a weak ass loser and you deserve more." He pressed himself right against me and smirked. "And why are you so sure we're gonna break up? Why can't you accept that me and you? We're forever."

He slid warm hands up my face to tangle in my hair and tilt my head backwards.

"No, Juice… I said no…"

He ignored me and pressed his warm lips against mine. It took all of three seconds for me to respond. His hands slid down my back until he was pulling me against him. I was half on the car and half wrapped around his body.

I wanted to hate myself for being so weak when it came to him. Every time he scared one of my dates away, I found myself in this position. The problem was, I decided as he kissed his way down my throat to my shoulder, that as long as he kept doing that with his tongue, I didn't care.

"Not in the garage! How many times do I gotta repeat myself?"

Juice peeled himself off me and flushed under the disapproving, cool glare of my father.

"Sorry, Clay." He muttered and walked towards the door that led to the clubhouse, leaving me and dad alone.

"Where's your date?"

I glared at the amused look on his face and shook my head.

"Aren't you supposed to be on my side? Aren't you supposed to tell me to stay away from the big, bad bikers?" I asked with a small smile as I accepted the bottle of water he held out towards me and shifted myself off the car.

"Hell no. Why would I want you going out with someone I can't scare into treating you right?"

I chuckled and he grinned, shrugging a little.

"You over this whole thing yet?"

Everyone seemed to see my reluctance to get tattooed as a ridiculous notion.

"Why can't you all accept that I don't want this? That I don't want branded like a fucking cow?"

"It ain't branding, baby." He took a seat on a nearby bench and I slid down beside him, allowing him to throw an arm over my shoulder in a rare show of affection.

"You know when you were ten and Jax took Tara to get her crow, all you wanted was a tattoo. You begged your mom to let you get one so that you could be an old lady like her and Luanne."

"I just wanted to fit in then. I didn't know what getting that tattoo actually meant in reality."

"I know that. And I get why you're not sure if you want it now."

I shot him a sceptical look and he laughed and nodded. "I do. I get it. But what you gotta remember, baby, is that the guys in this town look at you and they see SAMCRO, whether you have a crow tattoo or not. They see me, they see Jax and they see Juice and you torturing yourself and not getting inked ain't gonna change a damn thing."

He was right of course. He was a lot of things, my father, both good and bad but I always forgot how insightful he could be. When he wanted to be.

"You're a part of this world, You were born into it and there ain't no leaving. Getting inked and becoming an old lady isn't as bad as you're thinking it is."

He got up and walked away, leaving my with my thoughts. Juice and I had been together for two years. I'd known him a lot longer than that but it had taken him a long ass time to ask me out and even longer for me to agree.

I had never dated a club member before. I was convinced I was a strong, independent woman who didn't need the men in the club to look after her and I tried to prove it by having a string of boyfriends through and after high school. None of them lasted very long because none of them were strong enough to deal with this life; with my family.

With Juice it was different. He knew the world. He knew how it worked and I never had to hide anything about myself from him.

I had never realised that before. Juice knew me. The real me. The me that felt completely comfortable behind the bar of the club house because I knew the people and they knew me. None of the other guys I had ever gone with had known the real me. They had gotten the sugar coated version, the version that I deemed suitable to show the outside world and as I thought about it, I wasn't sure I wanted to sugar coat myself for the rest of my life.

I threw my head back with a groan and pushed myself off the bench.

Decision made, I headed towards the darkened club house, ducking behind the bar and pouring myself a shot of Jack. I tossed it back with a wince and ignored the amused look I was getting from Jax.

"Well, the old man talk some sense into you or what?"

"You're a jackass. You know that, right?" I knew my words lacked bite by the grin on his face getting bigger.

"You're just jealous that I'm mom and dad's favourite."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, sweetheart." I grinned suddenly, remembering something my best friend had told me earlier. "Speaking of, guess what I heard today?"

"Shoot." He motioned for a beer and I scowled at him as I popped the lid.

"I heard that one Miss Tara Knowles is back in Charming. Working as a doc in St Thomas."

By the pained look on his face, I knew he had already heard.

"Yeah, mom told me." I snorted.

"I bet she was so happy about it too."

"Don't matter anyway. Me and Tara, that's ancient history."

"Oh, okay. If that's how we're playing it." I smirked and took another shot of Jack before sighing and stepping around the bar.

"So, you decided what you're gonna do yet? About the tat?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "You gonna give me your two cents as well?"

"Nah… All I'm gonna say is that you could do a hell of a lot worse. Juice may not be the brightest, but he's a good kid."

"Yeah, yeah. So everyone keeps telling me." I smiled as the rest of the boys trailed into the bar, talking and laughing loudly. Juice was in the middle, listening to Tig explain something and laughing loudly. I caught his eye and motioned towards the door leading to the dorms. Jax clapped a hand on my shoulder.

"You're making the right decision, sis."

"Thanks, bro." I mocked with a grin as he walked towards Chibs and Bobby's table and threw himself down, pulling a red head onto his lap and smiling at her high pitched giggles.

I made my way towards Juice's dorm room and let myself in to wait on him. I threw myself onto the bed, pushing my shoes off and staring at the ceiling.

He came in a few minutes later and lay silently beside me, his arm brushing against mine every few seconds.

"Okay." I finally muttered.

"Yeah?" He asked, a smile spreading across his face. It lit up and made him look younger than he was and I smiled in response.

"Yeah."


	2. Pilot1

I'm in awe of the response so far! so glad so many of you like it. please keep reading and reviewing!

I don't (unfortunately) own SONS OF ANARCHY or anything that you recognise.

* * *

"That's it! I am done! Free!"

I threw my arms in the air with a load groan as the clock struck seven and my shift officially ended. Ignoring the amused looks I was getting from my boss, and best friend, I untied my apron as I walked towards the door marked staff only and pushed it open.

"You done here?"

I jumped a little at the sudden noise in the otherwise quiet office and threw Juice a dirty look as my heart slowed itself back down.

"Stalking me now?"

"You said you'd get the tat." He reminded me. Like he'd been reminding me, every time I saw him, for the last three weeks since I'd agreed to let him brand me as his property. What had I been on? Oh that's right. I'd been high on whiskey and my dad's rarely shown approval. Stupid, stupid me.

"Juice, you can't follow me constantly." I reminded him. "There are laws against it."

"Guess it's a good thing we got the cops in our pockets, huh?"

I glared at him as he grinned and shook my head. "Are you retarded? You can't say shit like that where people can hear you." I reminded him, smacking him lightly across the back of the head.

"Oops." He looked troubled for a second, peeking around the door and ensuring that no one had over heard us. "All clear." He perked up again.

I shook my head and moved towards my locker, pulling it open and throwing my apron inside. I slid my arms into my jacket and turned, surprised to see Juice so close to me.

"What are you doing?" I asked, nervously. He had an amused glint in his eye and that was never a good sign. He was up to something and I probably wouldn't like it.

"Call in sick and come for a ride with me." He suggested.

"You're kidding right? Juice…" I groaned in exasperation and shook my head. Sometimes he drove me insane in the most amazing way possible and sometimes he drove me insane in a really, really bad way. This was the latter.

"You know I can't call in sick to the club house. One, my mom would end up staying and serving behind the bar and that never works out well. Two, I need the money. Three, do you think Clay's stupid enough to fall for me being sick when he saw me this morning and I was fine? Or that he won't figure out that I'm off having sex with you instead of working when neither of us show up?"

He looked so crestfallen I had to chuckle. I wrapped my arm around his neck and stood on my tip toes to place a kiss on his lips. His hands found the curve of my waist easily and he lifted me slightly.

"Maybe I'll call in sick to the café tomorrow?" I suggested, tugging his bottom lip between my teeth before letting go and taking a step back.

"Promise?"

"I said maybe." I grinned. "Now come on, old man, give me a ride to work."

"You don't get to call me old man until you have a tat." He reminded me. "Why are you putting it off?"

"Cause I'm scared of needles, okay?" I lied. "Stop pressuring me."

"Ah, baby, I'm sorry." He looked immediately sorry and I felt a little bad for my lie. His arm slid around my shoulder and he tugged me against his side as we walked through the café, waving goodbye to my boss and workmates as we went. "You just let me know when you're ready. Happy said he'd do it if it made you feel more comfortable."

I shrugged. "Maybe. I'll let you know."

I climbed onto the bike, wrapping my arms around him and resting my head against the leather that covered his back. I closed my eyes and lost myself in the vibrations of the bike and the feel of Juice so close to me.

Dusk was just beginning to settle over the town as we pulled into the car park. I climbed off, reaching behind Juice's head to pull him down for a brief kiss before heading inside, leaving him to the catcalls and whistles from the other guys.

"Hey, baby."

"Hey dad. Busy today?"

"Busy enough. You look tired." He looked up from the stack of papers he had been reading and narrowed his eyes. "You work too hard. You should quit."

"Quit working the bar, you mean?" I asked with a smirk.

"Hell no. Quit that diner. You know I don't like you working so close to the edge of town. Can't you get a job somewhere closer? Somewhere the Mayans ain't so close to."

"You know the Mayans don't come into the diner, dad. They don't have the balls." I reassured him for what had to be the hundredth time since I had taken the job. "You know Otto has protection set up for Billie and Sean and don't think I don't notice the constant passing of Tig and Bobby. Plus the Tacoma boys always stop by on their way in and out of town. It's a Sam Crow diner, through and through." I pecked him on the cheek and headed through the doors leading to the dorms. I had half an hour before I was due to start work. Just enough time to shower and change in Juice's room, get rid of the smell of grease that seemed to cling for hours after I had a shift in SLOBs.

I grabbed underwear and a new vest out of the huge ass bag I had to haul everywhere with me as I kicked off my shoes. Juice's dorm had a bathroom that connected with one of the guest dorms and I made sure to lock both doors before I stripped and stepped under the hot spray. The water felt good on my sore shoulders and I sighed in relief as I washed myself off.

"Hey baby, you in there?"

I shrieked in surprise as Juice banged his hand on the door.

"Jesus, you gave me a heart attack." I groaned as I turned the shower off. "I'll be out in a few."

"Your mom wants you to call her."

"Okay."

I dried off quickly and shimmied into my jeans and vest, tying my hair in a knot at the back of my head before brushing my teeth with the spare toothbrush I kept here.

I didn't stay at the clubhouse often. Usually Juice came home with me at the end of my shift. But I kept the necessities here, just in case.

He was lying on the bed when I came out, his arms behind his head and his eyes closed.

"You're almost out of toothpaste." I commented as I stuffed my dirty clothes into my bag and throw it on the other side of the bed. Ten minutes before the start of my shift.

I eased myself onto the bed, propping my head up on his chest and staring at the thin line of skin that was revealed when his shirt rode up. I walked my fingers across the strip of skin, smiling when he shuddered beneath me. I shimmied up until I was straddling him, reaching down for a slow kiss.

He really was gorgeous. All dark tanned skin covered in inky black tattoos. Sure, some people laughed at his hair cut and the lightening bolts that ran down either side of it but who cared? My baby was an original thinker… sometimes anyway.

"I gotta go." I muttered. Juice's hand tightened on my hair momentarily before he heaved a sigh.

"I know. I know."

I pushed myself up off the bed and headed out into the clubhouse again, pausing as Jax rushed in, out of breath.

"Where's Clay?" He demanded, grabbing me by the shoulder.

"He was here when I got in. I dunno where he went. What the hell's wrong with you?"

He glared at me before sighing. "The warehouse just exploded."

"What warehouse?" I asked, wondering why a warehouse had him so rattled. As he shot me an exasperated look my eyes widened.

"The ammo?" I whispered, shooting a look at the three very obviously under aged girls at a table nearby. He nodded and stepped past me.

"Shit." I muttered, heading for the bar. "Shit."

I wasn't my mom. I didn't know all of the clubs dealings or anything but I knew enough. I was definitely kept in the loop more than the other old ladies or kids of members. I hadn't decided if that was a good thing or a bad thing. That ammo warehouse was a big fucking deal. I had heard my mom and dad talking about a delivery for the One Niners sometime soon. If the ammo was gone… shit. No way it was an accident.

"You seen Jax or Clay?"

I looked up from cleaning the bar and frowned at Tig and the two blondes beneath his arms.

"Move it or loose it, ladies." I snapped, grinning triumphantly when they shot me identically dirty looks and left his side. "Jax just went through. Said something about the ammo warehouse blowing up."

Tig's eyes widened and he cursed, loudly. "Alright. I'll forgive you for getting rid of my girls for that."

"You know taking out the trash is in my job description." I called at his back with a smirk.

Usually, the girls in the clubhouse didn't bother me. I usually let the sight of them run right off my back. But since my conversation with Juice and agreeing to get the crow, everything they did seemed a million times worse, because I just couldn't stop imagining them doing it with Juice. And I knew, deep down, that he had never cheated on me. But I remembered before we were going out. I remembered coming in to pick something up one morning and finding him sprawled across a pool table with some slutty bitch draped across his very bare chest. I remembered the whispered conversations in the bathroom, the sweet butts all comparing the guys, who had the best stamina, who was the best in bed etc etc and every time I remembered, it pissed me off.

"Hey, baby, if the rest of the guys come in, send them straight into church."

I nodded at my dad and went back to serving the customers without a smile.

Bobby and Chibs were the next to arrive. "Hey, darlin', I need a drink."

Chibs had the most amazing accent. Just the sound of his voice made me grin because everything he said sounded so good with that accent. I fixed him and Bobby straight whiskeys and passed them across the table.

"Clay wants to see you in Church." I told them after they'd downed their drinks.

"See you later, kid." I waved at them and sighed.

It was a slow night. The lack of bikers meant that the sweet butts were slowly but surely trickling out of the club. Some of the old ladies still sat around a table and smiled at me when they saw me looking. I waved back before deciding to restock the bar. I needed something to kill time. There were a group of college kids sitting around a table, looking around them in awe. They weren't from around here, I noticed, and that could be trouble if the got drunk enough. I made a mental note to water down their drinks and throw them out if they got too rowdy. The prospect was at a table, looking through a magazine of some sort. He'd give me a hand if I needed it.

* * *

"Hey pretty girl. Gimme a beer."

I was ten minutes away from my shift ending and had started to count up the money in the register. The group of college kids were the only customers left and I looked up to see the dark haired guy that had been pestering me all night. Apparently he just couldn't take a hint.

"Bar's closed. Gotta head out and find somewhere else." I told him flatly. I caught Half Sack's eye and motioned to the table. He stood and headed towards it, telling them to get their asses out.

"Now I don't belief for a second that a biker bar like this closes at one in the morning. How about you let me and my buddies stay for a little while."

"How about you and your buddies do what you're asked and get out." I retorted. "Bar's closed."

"Alright, alright." He grinned drunkenly and leaned over until I got a whiff of the alcohol on his breath. "How about you come with us, doll, and show us where the best party is."

"No." I replied flatly. "Now go get your stuff and get out. The bar is closed."

His face fell then and he glared at me. "Guess you're only here for the biker's entertainment, huh? Us upstanding citizens just don't do it for you, is that it? I've heard about biker whores before but I've never met one til now."

"Hey, jack ass, get the hell out." Half Sack pulled the guy away from the bar and I groaned as I saw three of his friends stand up from their table and make their way towards us unsteadily. I really didn't give two fucks what some yuppie college kid thought of me but I did not want to have to stay late and clear up after a fight.

"Four against one, biker boy, I don't fancy your chances." The jackass was grinning as he stepped up to Half Sack.

"Seriously, jackass, get the fuck out before one of you get hurt." I tired once more, stepping between them. The dark haired guy wrapped an arm around my upper arm, tight enough to bruise, and pushed me out of the way. I winced as my hip hit the edge of the bar and glared up at him just in time to see Half Sack through the first punch.

"Shit." I muttered, heading around the bar for the pistol that was kept for occasions such as this.

"What do we have here, then?"

I sat the pistol down again and turned to watch the guys stroll out of church and take in the scene. Half Sack and the guy were going at each other while the guy's friends were circling them, looking for an opening to attack. The two girls in the group were huddled against the wall, arms around each other and eyes wide.

I watched as Tig strolled into the middle of the fight, followed closely by Jax and Chibs, and grabbed the nearest guy. The fight broke up quickly then, with Tig physically throwing one of them through the door.

I sighed and began picking up the glass that had fallen and broken during the fight.

"Jackass college kids." I muttered, glowering in the direction they had left. "We should have a fucking entrance policy."

"You alright?" Half Sack asked as we passed each other. He was sweeping the floor, a cut beneath his eye bleeding slightly.

"I'm good. You okay?" I asked, reaching up and wiping the blood away. "That looks nasty."

"Nah, it's okay." He smiled shyly. He nodded to me and continued his brushing as I threw the last of the glass into a trash bag.

"Hey, what happened your arm?"

I glanced up at Juice and shrugged. "College asshole grabbed me and pushed me against the bar."

His eyes darkened and I knew by the glance that he threw at the door that he was debating going after them, giving them a worse beating than the one they'd received.

"I'm fine, Juice. Let's just go home."

"Let me grab the stuff." He nodded. "Stay right here."

I nodded and pulled myself onto a stood, resting a head against Jax's shoulder when he sat next to me.

"Have you heard from Wendy recently?"

I laughed before I could stop myself. "You're kidding right? Wendy hates me. Always has, always will. We don't exactly keep in touch."

"You know she's having your niece or nephew, right? You might have to actually get along."

"No we don't. I'll just see my gorgeous niece whenever she's with her daddy." I grinned up at him as he shook his head and laughed.

"You really think it's a girl?"

"Oh yeah."

I hopped down as Juice returned and waved at the rest of the guys while making my way towards dad.

"Night, baby." He muttered, mind completely occupied.

"I'll call mom and let her know you won't be home." I assured him. He nodded and I smiled.

"Let's go, baby."  
I leant against Juice with a yawn, letting him lead me into the cool night air.


	3. Pilot2

Thanks for all the reviews from the last chapter. Once again, i don't own any characters that you recognise. Please read and review.

* * *

I woke the next morning to fingertips brushing over the skin of my bare back, quickly replaced by soft, warm lips. I smiled into my pillow and stretched out more, groaning at the loss of heat when he pulled away.

"What are you doing?" I whimpered, rolling onto my back to look up at him. He was smirking down at me, a happy, playful smirk that was rarely seen outside of this room.

"Nothing. What do you want me to do?"

"Loaded question, baby." I replied, reaching up for him. I pulled him down on to me, lifting my legs to lock them around his hips and smiling when his eyes fell shut and he groaned.

The shrill ringing of his phone broke us apart just before our lips met and I threw my head onto the pillow with a disappointed grunt.

"I have to…"

"I know, I know." I withdrew my legs, throwing them over the edge of the bed while he rolled over and grabbed the phone on the bedside table.

"Juice." I rolled my eyes at his way of answering the phone but smiled as he lay back down and motioned for me to join him. I listened to his half of the conversation, obviously with one of the club, as I stroked my hand across the hard planes of his stomach and chest. Warm fingers gripped my hand as I strayed close to the line of his boxers, tugging my hand until I was lying flat on top of him.

I rested my chin on the warm skin of his chest, admiring him as he continued his conversation. His hand came up to cup the back of my head and I grinned, dropping an open mouthed kiss just above his nipple.

"Sure, Tig. On my way."

I groaned as he looked at me guiltily, rolling off him and onto the ground, standing and stretching.

"Your dad and Jax took Tig and Bobby to look at the damage from last night. He needs me to see if I can track down the guns. I'm sorry baby."

I sighed and nodded, reaching for the jeans I had been wearing yesterday. I slid them over my hips, shoving my feet into flip flops and shoving my hair into a bun.

I had already called into the diner so I had the entire day free. Juice and I had been planning a day in bed followed by another night in bed but I guess that wasn't happening.

"You mad?"

I finished dressing, grabbing my bag and throwing my IPOD, keys and phone into it.

"Not a big surprise, I guess." I replied. "I'm gonna do some shit around the house, laundry and stuff. I might stop by for lunch later."

He smiled happily and I found myself melting against him, loving that he was so easy to please.

"Hey, love you." He kissed me softly; softer than usual. I felt my lips curve up in a smile.

"You too."

"See you later."

I watched through the bedroom window as he climbed onto his bike and roared off down the street before heading towards the kitchen. I stopped to put my IPOD into the dock Juice had installed in the hallway. If had speakers that fed into every room of the apartment and I smiled as an old ACDC song filled the quiet.

After washing the dinners left from breakfast yesterday and putting a wash in the machine, I moved through the apartment. It wasn't that messy and only took an hour to fully tidy and vacuum. By the time my clothes were washed and dried and I had showered off the smell of stale beer, cigarette smoke and Juice, it was a little after two.

I braided my hair and was brushing blusher across my cheek when my cell lit up and rang loudly.

"Hey, mom."

"Hey baby. I swung by the diner, Billie said you'd asked for the day off."

"Yeah, had planned a day with Juice but he got called in this morning." I told her. She chuckled and I heard her inhale from a cigarette.

"No shit. You coming for diner tomorrow night? You and Juice? I just picked up some steaks."

"Yum. We'll be there. Jax coming?"

"Him and Chibs. Hey, you know the prospect doesn't eat meat?"

"I did not." I chuckled. "He doesn't look like a vegan."

"Never trust anyone who doesn't eat meat." Mom advised. "You meeting Juice for lunch?"

"Was gonna drive over to Mike's and pick up some sandwiches for the guys and then head on over."

"I'll swing by and get you. Checking on Wendy for Jax and then I'll be over."

"Okay, thanks mom."

I hung the phone up and threw it back into my bag before standing with a stretch. I had to do a few more things before I left and I headed back into the bedroom to open the window and air out the smell of sex. I switched my laptop on and signed into my email account quickly. I needed to pay a few bills online and send a few replies to friends.

My phone ran loudly in my bag as I was making the bed and I rushed into the living room to grab it.

"Hey, mom."

"Get your ass to St Thomas."

"Oh my God, Juice?" I felt my legs shake as dozens of scenarios ran through my head, each worse than the last.

"No. Stupid crank whore. I can't reach Jax, gonna go pick him up. Meet us there."

I nodded, even though she had already hung up and couldn't see me, and rushed outside to the car. Throwing my bag into the passenger seat, I pressed the accelerator and sped down the road.

Wendy had been doing crank for as long as I'd known her. She'd hidden it well but eventually the truth came out and Jax dumped her. A brief reconciliation led to a pregnancy that was likely the only good thing to come out of them being together.

We'd never gotten along, Wendy and me. Maybe it was because I had grown up so close to Tara. Maybe it was because no one else, in my eyes, was good enough for Jax. Mostly it was because Wendy had started off as a crow eater and I hated her for it. Crow eaters were not supposed to end up as the wives of the club. They sucked dick and that was it. They weren't supposed to show up at my family's diners and sit there, acting like they belonged, as if they'd been there forever. She'd never fit in with the family, not really.

St Thomas was quiet when I parked the car; mom's car was already there and surrounded by bikes. I grabbed my bag and climbed out, rushing inside. I caught up with Mom and everyone else at the elevators.

"What do we know?" I asked, placing a hand on Jax's arm as we walked down the hallway. He squeezed my hands tightly before dropping it.

"Found these matches next to a bunch of her empty thumb bags. Hairy Dog." Mom handed the matches to Dad and he scowled.

"Shit! Gotta be the Nords, dealing out of the Dog again."

"Darby got out of Chino two weeks ago." Bobby commented.

"Yeah, well call that Nazi prick and set a meeting." Dad growled.

If I could get my hands around that stupid whore's neck I'd kill her, I decided. Hell, if I could get my hands around the fucking dealer's neck I'd kill him too.

As our group reached a glass panel, Tara stepped out and made her way towards us. I could see another doctor, working on Wendy's lifeless looking body and I felt the anger begin to build in the pit of my stomach.

There was no happy greetings or hugs as Tara took her spot in front of us. She gave me a tight smile that I returned before turning to Jax.

"When was the last time you saw her?"

"Couple weeks."

"Her hands and feet are full of tracks. Toxicology reports aren't back yet but it's most likely crank."

"The baby?"

"Had to do an emergency C section. He's ten weeks premature."

The look on Jax's face broke my heart and I felt the anger build a little more inside.

"Holy shit."

"Come on, let's sit down and I'll walk you through it."

"Just tell me."

I stood on one side of Jax while mom stood on the other. My knuckles where white as I listened to Tara's words. This wasn't happening to my nephew. It couldn't be.

I had already gotten clothes and toys and all sorts of things for the little guy and now there was a chance he wouldn't make it? Fuck that.

I hastily wiped at my eyes, trying to hide the tears that had sprung up while I listened to Tara. His chances weren't good. Hell, they were pathetic. I looked to the ground, trying to get my emotions back under control.

"I'll take you to see him now."

I took a step after Tara but faltered when mom grabbed my arm. Jax stepped closer to Tara and spoke softly before he turned on his heel and strode down the hall.

"Jax!" Tara and I called at the same time.

"Jackson!" Mom was next, taking a step behind him before she was caught by dad.

"Go with Tara. I got something to do." He ordered us before speeding up.

"Watch his back." Dad told Chibs and Bobby. They followed after him while mom and I followed Tara, dad close on our heels.

When we reached the small room, I felt mom wrap her fingers around mine. The two of us looked down onto the single most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

I had never been broody. Kids weren't really my thing, at all. But little Abel was so perfect. Lying on a blue cotton sheet with a little blue cap on, he looked so tiny. So tiny and so breakable.

"Oh God." I heard mom breath and I nodded. Tara stood in the doorway, watching with a sad look on her face.

Mom and I stayed in the hospital for a few more hours, just staring through the window at Abel and talking quietly. Dad had called and said that Jax had paid the dealer a visit and that they were going in to church for an hour or so. He asked me to come in an hour early to cover and I'd agreed, glad of the distraction.

"We still on for dinner tomorrow?" I asked as I stood beside my car, waiting to climb in. Mom nodded, taking a drag of her cigarette and exhaling slowly.

"I'll have to see if Jax is up for it but I think so." She replied. "I'm gonna come back here tomorrow to see the kid. You think Billy could swing you another day off."

"Yeah, should be fine. I'll call her later. Bye mom."

After dropping a kiss on her cheek, I climbed in and pulled out of the hospital parking lot. My mind was swimming. I was angry and sad and I felt so sorry for Jax. I couldn't get the picture of my tiny nephew out of my head. I just couldn't grasp the fact that the beautiful baby boy that lay there would most likely not live to see his first month. The thought brought tears to my eyes again and I hastily wiped at them as I pulled into the lot.

"Hey Mika."

I smiled pathetically at Half Sack when he greeted me before taking my place behind the bar. It was still early so the club wasn't too busy and I pulled a stood around, flipping through a magazine as I waited on the club to finish. I took a deep breath and gagged.

"Holy shit what's that smell?"

I looked around the room in disgust, wondering what could possibly be stinking the room out so much. I opened my mouth to ask Half Sack what it was when the guys spilled out, talking loudly. Half Sack practically dove behind the bar, pulling out bottle after bottle and handing them out. When he was done I looked at him in amusement and he shrugged, a shy look on his face.

"Hey baby."

I looked up at Juice and smiled. He leaned over the counter and tugged at my wrist until I was doing the same.

"Hey you." I replied, accepting the soft kiss he offered.

"You alright?"

"Not really." I looked around to make sure Jax wasn't nearby before continuing. "He's just so small, Juice. How can someone so small be expected to survive this, you know?"

He nodded, even though I knew he didn't get what I was saying, and pressed his lips to my inner wrist. "You just gotta believe that he's gonna be okay, baby."

Sometimes Juice amazed me with his sudden insights.

"Are you out of your goddamn mind?"

I looked up to see Half Sack with the head of a deer in his hands. "Jesus Christ."

Juice wandered over to the pool table and stood next to the boys.

"It's gotta be stuffed and treated, you idiot." Jax snapped.

"I know… I just… stuffed with what?"

Laughter broke out in the club house and for the first time all day, I felt my spirits lift as I joined in.

The club began filling then. The sweet butts came in groups of three or four, all dressed in tiny outfits that left nothing to the imagination. They broke apart once they were inside, each of them leeching on to whichever member of the club was their favourite.

I watched as two blondes circled around Juice. One of them glanced towards the bar, no doubt to see if I was working, and I cheerfully shot her the finger. She scowled and whispered something to her friend and the two of them took off in Tig's direction.

"Tig and Happy are gonna have a match in the ring." Juice told me when he rejoined me at the bar an hour later. "They were sniping at each other in church and outside."

"Yeah?" I asked, distracted. A match would draw people outside, which left less for me to do. "I'm gonna ask dad if I can take off. Prospect can watch the bar for awhile."

"You want me to take you home?" Juice asked. I saw the longing look on his face as he gazed outside, where the party was livening up. He wanted to stay and mingle with the club and I wasn't really feeling social anyway.

"No, you stay and enjoy yourself." I told him.

"Nah, baby, I'll take you home." He shook his head and wrapped an arm around me.

"Juice… baby, I'm real tired. I just wanna go home, maybe soak in a bath and crawl into bed. Mom and I are gonna see the kid again tomorrow and I need to prepare for that. I can't prepare if you're there to distract me."

"Distract you, huh?" He whispered. I was on his side of the bar now. There were only a few people inside and I could hear the encouragement being shouted to Tig and Happy. "Distract you like… this?"

His teeth grazed the skin of my neck and I shuddered against him. His hands came up to rest just below my ass, squeezing briefly and pressing himself against me before letting go and continuing their journey up my back.

"Juice." I moaned softly as he lips caught mine. He backed me against the bar and leaned into me, deepening the kiss and swallowing my sighs. His fingers came to a final stop on my waist, easily slipping beneath the material of my shirt and stroking my ribs.

"Jesus, get a room." We broke apart at the sound of the female voice and I glared at the blonde who'd been looking to get into Juice's pants earlier. She continued walking towards the door as I glared at her, ignoring Juice's amused chuckle beside me.

"You sure you don't want me to come and… distract you?"

"Stay. Enjoy yourself. Go ask my dad if I can leave."

He growled at me and I smiled innocently up at him.

"You always give me the shitty jobs."

I watched him leave before turning back to the bar.

"You think I'm ever gonna do anything right?"

I looked across to where Half Sack was standing, ripping up a cardboard box. He looked so down that I couldn't help but smile. The deer head was still next to him and I gagged a little at the sight.

"Everyone's gotta do something right at some point." I told him. "Even if it's an accident."

He snorted and shook his head. "Clay thinks I'm a dumb ass. They're never gonna patch me in, are they?"

"Honey, are you asking me? Because you know they don't let me vote, right?" I asked with a smile. He sat on a stood on the other side of the bar and I handed him a drink. "Don't get so uptight about it. Just relax and enjoy it. Sure, you're gonna fuck up but so is Jax and Juice and Bobby. Whatever. Point is, you may have screwed up with the animal carcass but by tomorrow night, someone else will have done something equally stupid and no one will give a rat's ass about you and your deer." I told him with a soft smile. I liked Half Sack; had since the day Chibs had introduced him to me as the new prospect. He was a sweet kid. Ex military, I think. Smart too. And he had a cute smile. It wasn't downright sexy like Juice's, but it was cute.

"You really think so?"

"I grew up in this club, honey. I've seen stupid like you would not believe."

"Thanks, Mika… hey, are you okay? I heard about Jax's kid and I know you and Gemma stayed at the hospital."

"I'm alright. Thanks."

He smiled again and turned away but I stopped him with a hand to the arm. "Hey, prospect. What's your real name?"

"Kip."

I smiled at him and nodded, letting him go. I turned back to the front of the bar and saw Juice leaning against the doorway, glaring at Kip's back. I cleared my throat and he stormed towards me.

"Maybe you should get _Kip_ to go home with you and distract you." He snapped. "Since you two are so close, what with you comforting him over his stupidity and all."

"You're fucking kidding me, right?" I asked angrily. I knew Juice was a jealous guy. I accepted that a long time ago about him but I hated when that side of him came out. He was always so nasty when he thought he had something to prove.

"Clay said you could go." He told me coldly. "I'll get _Kip_ to watch the bar."

"Whatever, jackass." I replied. Turning to Kip, who was watching us carefully, I smiled sweetly. "Good night, Kip."

"Uh, night, Mika." He replied, nervously shooting Juice a look.

"Night, asshole." I pushed past Juice and headed towards the lot. I wanted to stay and talk to Jax, see where he was with the whole Abel thing, but Juice had made me so angry that I had to leave.

"Fucking prick." I muttered, climbing into the car. I was about to start it when the passenger door slid open and the devil himself dropped into the seat. His jaw was clenched and his mouth set in a hard line.

"What do you want? I figured you'd go find yourself some easy pussy to bury yourself in to punish me. Since I'm such a slut and I'm obviously after the prospect." I snapped as I started the car.

"Oh I'm gonna bury myself in pussy alright." He retorted. "But it won't be a sweet butt's."

* * *

Okay i have to clear a few things up. Thanks to ozlady80 and goodnitegirl23 for noticing the mistake i made. It was a genuine error. I forgot that the club doesn't serve outsiders.

This story is going to follow the episodes but it will be AU. It has to be because Juice isn't in every episode and obviously i can't really include Mika in some of the club's business. So i am trying to follow the storyline but i will be adding my own little stories as well.

Also, ozlady80, yes Mika is Clay and Gemma's daughter.

anyway, thanks for pointing out my mistakes and please keep doing so if you notice anymore. hope you enjoy the chapter and hopefully the last part of the pilot will be posted before the weekend.


	4. Pilot3

Next chapter! sorry it took so long. Work is getting busier coming up to Easter and my boyfriend has discovered Youtube and it's getting harder to get my latop back from him now.

please read and review.

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"SLOBs diner, this is Billie, how may I help you?"

I rolled my eyes at the fake cheerful tone of voice that Billie put on to answer the phone.

"It's me, Blondie." I told her.

"You let me get out that whole greeting? You're such a bitch, Mika." She chuckled and I grinned.

"You know me. Listen, any chance I could get the night off? I swear I'll make it up to you guys next week." I knew she wouldn't say no but I bit my lip anyway as I waited on her response.

"Sure, I'll get Lisa in to cover for you. How's the baby?"

"No word so far. They were doing the op this morning and your mom is meeting me and mom at the hospital in an hour or so to see how it went."

"Fingers crossed, huh? How's lover boy?"

"Lover boy is a douche." I mock growled. "Got all fucking green because I was talking to the prospect last night. Came home with me and we had some seriously hot angry sex against my bedroom door but I'm still waiting on an apology. He had to go in this morning, Tig called at ten and hauled him into the garage. Left without a fucking word."

"What a jackass." Billie chuckled. "He really thought you were after the prospect or that the prospect has enough balls to be after you?"

"I know, right?" I tucked my feet under me as I settled myself against the pillows on my bed. "He just… he drives me up the fucking wall, you know? I'm pretty sure he thinks he's in the right and I'm a little scared of what he's gonna do to Kip."

"Who the fuck is Kip?"

"Kip's the prospect." I chuckled. "Not the best name, huh?"

"Kip the biker… It has potential."

"What am I gonna do, B?" I sighed.

"About what? Juice? You just have to chill. You know he's not the brightest light bulb but he's a good guy… he's _your _good guy. Give him a few hours of silence and the apologies and gifts will start flooding in." Her voice was warm and reassuring and I felt myself relax a little. Billie knew both me and Juice and she was right. When Juice screwed up a day or so of silence on my part usually kicked his ass into gear again.

"You think I should get the tat?" I asked. There was silence for a few seconds before she laughed, long and hard and loud. By the end of her giggles, I was glaring at the phone, hoping she could feel my annoyance down the line.

"Honey, tattoo or no tattoo, you belong to that boy. And tattoo or no tattoo, he belongs to you. You gotta stop questioning this, and questioning yourself. When Juice asked you about the tattoo for the first time, you were so excited. What happened to change that?"

I knew exactly what had happened. I had walked into the ladies room at the clubhouse and while I was in a stall, a group of crow eaters had walked inside. One of them was proclaiming, loudly, about the fact that she had slept with four of the group, but Juice was the best in bed. Then she described, in great, gory detail, what he had done to her and what she had done in return. It had made me feel sick and, although I knew it was in the past, it had made me doubt Juice. It had made me doubt _us. _And ever since then, I hadn't been able to wrap my head around the idea of getting the crow tattoo.

"You still there?"

"Yeah, sorry. Was in a world of my own."

"Look, baby girl, you know you're my best friend in the whole world and I would never intentionally lead you astray…"

"Liar!"

"Alright, so maybe I've led you astray a few times but you know I'd never lead you to get hurt, not on purpose. So listen to me very carefully. Juice loves you. You may not like his jealous streak or the fact that he follows your dad's orders like a little puppy dog, but you love him. I've seen you go toe to toe with your dad on his behalf. Hell, I've seen you go toe to toe with your mom for him and your mom is one scary lady when she wants to be. Anyway, the two of you will eventually end up an old, bickering, biker couple no matter what you do so you may as well suck it up and get the crow."

"I told Juice I was afraid of needles." I admitted. Billie laughed again and I could picture her shaking her head in amused disbelief.

"That poor boy." She chuckled. "Having to put up with someone as insane and high maintenance as you."

"I am not high maintenance, bitch." I told her, although I didn't bother denying the insanity. "Anyway, I gotta go, mom should be here soon to pick me up and you know how she is if I'm not ready and waiting. I'll call you later?"

"You better. Love you, bye."

I hung up and smiled, feeling better than I had since yesterday morning. Billie had this amazing knack for putting everything into perspective for me. She knew me as well, if not better, than I knew myself and she could always tell me straight out if I was being stupid. Mom wasn't due for another hour so I jumped into the shower to kill the time.

I was slipping a cardigan on over my halter neck and shorts just as mom honked from outside. Luanne was already in the car when I got out and I smiled at her as I climbed in to the back.

"Any news?" I asked quietly. Mom took a drag of her cigarette and shook her head.

"No. I talked to Jax last night. I stopped by the house to tidy some shit up. Dumb crank whore's been living in shit for a while now. He's fucked up."

"Jax? Of course he is. You know this kids the only good thing that came out of Jax's little marriage experiment. And that bitch fucked it all up." My voice was harder than normal but I couldn't bring myself to care. Right now I wasn't capable of feeling of anything other than hate for the blonde bitch who had been my sister in law.

"They were putting him under this morning. Tara says she's got the best team working on him…" Mom's voice was harder and more brittle than mine and I knew, in that second, exactly how worried she was.

"I'm glad Tara's working on him. I'd rather have someone we know… someone we can trust and someone who actually cares what happens to him, working on him than one of those cold hearted docs who don't really see him as a person, you know?"

"Yeah. What's your take on her being back?" She kept her voice light and curious but I could sense the undercurrent in it. Mom had never been Tara's biggest fan and when she had left and broke Jax's heart… well, I'm not sure mom would ever forgive that.

"You know I always liked her, mom." I reminded her softly. "Sure, I hated her for leaving for awhile but I always knew she'd come back. And you have to accept that her and Jax could get back together."

"Over my dead body." She replied instantly and I grinned. My mom was hilariously over protective of her little boy.

We pulled into the hospital parking lot and I stretched as I climbed out. Luanne wrapped a hand around my arm and I smiled at her. Luanne had been my surrogate mom for as long as I could remember and had been trying to convince me to join her porn company since the day I turned 17.

"How you doing, baby?" She asked. I shrugged.

"I'm fine. Or I will be as soon as we know that Abel's gonna be fine." I smiled at her. She nodded as we walked, tightening her grip a little in a comforting gesture.

"I'm gonna run to the bathroom quickly." Luanne said. "I'll meet you up in children's."

"Where are the boys?" I asked once we were in the safety of the elevator.

"Went to meet Darby and one of his boys about the crank." She told me. Mom never hid anything from me. It was part of her charm. "I don't think Juice went with them though. Clay said something about him storming out after you last night. Everything okay there?"

I told her what had happened and she smirked. "Always keep that boy on his toes. If he's too worried about you banging someone else, he'll be too busy to bang anyone but you."

"Experience, mom?" I chuckled.

"Maybe. I was young and good looking once."

"You're still young and good looking, mom. And you damn well know it."

She grinned at me, one of her honestly amused smiles. They weren't seen very often so every time I managed to drag one from her, I considered it a personal coup.

Luanne met us a few minutes later and the three of us waited patiently. Mom and Luanne were talking quietly as I stared out a window. They sprung up as Tara walked towards us and I took a few strides to join them. She was still in her scrubs and she looked nervous.

"Abel's stomach surgery went well but its putting strain on his system. Dr doesn't want to wait. Thinks we should do the heart surgery now."

"But that's good right? That they're not waiting."

"It's the best choice, yes." Tara nodded.

"Thanks." Mom told her, turning away. Tara glanced at me before looking back.

"Can we talk?" She asked mom. Handing her purse to Luanne, she moved to follow Tara. I debated following them before deciding that I would wait. Mom would tell me what had happened anyway.

They walked down the hallway, talking intently. Eventually they stopped, mom standing with her back to me. I could see the anger slowly filling Tara's face and could only imagine what mom was saying. Tara turned to walk away and mom reached out, grabbing the bottom of her top and lifting it enough for me to clearly see the crow that had been tattooed there. Tara whirled around and they had another heated exchange before mom turned back towards us, walking back down. I saw her mouth the word bitch and rolled my eyes. She really couldn't leave it alone.

"What did she want?" Luanne asked as we took our seats again.

"She wants someone to coddle Wendy. Apparently the bitch is still detoxing and crying all over the doc. Wanted me to let her know she wasn't alone."

I scoffed and shook my head. "You told her where to go, I take it."

"Yeah I did. And you better do the same if she corners you. None of this soft hearted shit. I want this bitch out of our lives for good."

"I may not be as hard hearted as you, mama, but I'm not soft. I want that whore gone as much as you do. She's been messing Jax up for way too long."

"You talking about Wendy? Or Tara?"

I glared at her as she smirked before shaking my head and turning away.

* * *

Luanne left after a couple of hours, leaving mom and me sitting in the uncomfortable chairs. I wasn't sure what time it was but my back was aching from sitting there.

"Mom, I'm gonna walk down to the coffee shop. You want a coffee?"

"Please, baby." She replied. I kissed her on the cheek before heading towards the elevator. Once inside, I switched my phone back on and waited on it loading up again.

There was a coffee shop a few blocks from the hospital and I headed there, rather than going to the cafeteria in St Thomas.

It was dark when I stepped outside and I suddenly wished I had thought about that when I dressed this morning. My phone began vibrating in my pocket as messages came through and I smiled when I saw I had four missed calls from Juice, seven text messages and one voicemail. I listened to it first, smiling as his warm voice filled my ear.

"I'm a jackass. I'm sorry, baby. I'm going on a run tonight with the boys but I'll come over when I get home and make it up to you. Love you."

The first text message was pretty much in the same vein and I quickly read the rest. Three were from Billie, one was from Jax and the rest were from Juice. Billie wanted to know how the op had gone but I decided her mom had probably filled her in and didn't reply. One was from Jax, asking me to check in on Wendy and let him know how the op went because he didn't think he could make it in. I shot him a quick reply, telling him about the second op and about mom and Tara's run in. I sent Juice a longer message, telling him to be careful and to come by when he was done, we needed to talk.

The coffee shop was empty at this time and I waited patiently on the guy behind the counter making our drinks before setting back to the hospital, shivering in the cold air. I knew I should have worn jeans, I cursed myself.

Mom was sitting exactly where I left her, her fingers entwined on her knees as she stared at the opposite wall. I handed her the coffee I had gotten her and she smiled at me. I sat next to her, resting my head on her shoulder in an attempt at silent comfort.

"Any more word?"

"Yeah. Doc said he came through. Gonna have to stay here for a while but he's out of the woods for now." She murmured, before turning to me. "I went to see Wendy."

My eyes filled with tears with relief before the second half of her sentence registered.

"Wait, what? Why?"

She shook her head and motioned behind me. I turned to see Jax and Clay stride towards us, Juice a little behind them. I took in the blood on Jax's shirt and sighed quietly.

"You alright?" Mom asked before I could open my mouth to comment. He nodded.

"I'm gonna find Tara. See what she says." He shot me a look and I knew he had gotten my text. I shrugged and avoided looking at mom.

"You." Dad pointed at me. "Go home and get some sleep. You look like shit."

"Aww, thanks, daddy. You know just how to make a girl feel good about herself." I retorted, but I stood anyway. Juice was standing silently a few feet away and I knew as soon as I saw him that he was here to take me home. "Call me if there's any change."

I leant down and dropped a kiss on mom's cheek, followed by one on dad's.

"See you guys tomorrow."

Juice's arm was warm around my shoulders as he led me outside.

"You do look tired." He commented as we approached his bike. "I'll make you some food when we get home and you can sleep."

I smiled and rested myself against his back as he rode through the dark, silent streets. The wind was cold on my skin but I couldn't care because Juice and I were okay, for now, my brother, dad and boyfriend had all come back from something alive and my nephew would survive. Today was shaping up to be a good day.

My phone buzzed as I climbed off the bike and I opened it to read the text from Jax.

_Wendy got sum1 2 sneak her in crnk. ODed. Critical._

"Jesus, mom, what the hell did you do."


	5. Seeds1

Next chapter. Thanks for all the reviews! Hope you like this one! Happy Easter!

* * *

"When food is gone, you are my daily meal, when friends are gone I know my saviours love is real. Your love is real. You got the love. You got the love…"

I sang along to the radio as I cleaned down the counter of the café. It was early in the morning and there was no one around but me and Billie. She sat in a booth, pouring over figures and scratching her head ever so often as she scrunched her nose in confusion.

"Why don't you get someone in to do that? You can afford it, right?" I asked, pushing a cup of coffee across the table at her. She shrugged and took a sip.

"I probably could but I wanna do it myself, you know? And I'm getting better at it every time I do it. Mom offered me her guy, but I'd rather stay clear of the whole porn connection as long as possible."

I chuckled and rested my head against the back of the booth, singing along again quietly.

The bell on the door jingled a little and I looked up as David Hale strode into the garage, along with one of the police officers whose name I didn't know. I stood up and forced a smile on my face as I took my spot behind the counter.

"You're a little far out of your usual hunting ground, deputy." I commented, keep the smile on my face. He smirked knowingly at me and shrugged.

"Heading out of Charming to check out a crime scene. Thought I'd need some coffee. To go."

"No problem. Is that two coffees?"

"Sure." Hale took a seat at the counter while the other officer hovered by the door, looking around nervously. I saw his eyes linger at the 'Free Big Otto' poster behind the counter and grinned. SLOBs wasn't Teller Morrow but it was easily recognisable as a SAMCRO establishment. Otto's kids owned it and I worked in it. The boys stopped by if they were out in the direction and there was a cut, hung and framed, hanging on one of the walls. On an opposite wall was a reaper design, the same design that was in Luanne's home and on Otto's bike.

"So, ladies, you wouldn't know anything about the warehouse outside of town that blew up, would you?" Hale asked casually but I could hear the seriousness beneath his voice. So could Billie because her head shot up and she glanced at him.

"What would we know? That warehouse is no where near here." I replied, looking him in the eye like my mom had always told me to. "I'm sorry, are you accusing Billie and me of blowing up a warehouse?"

I laughed but I knew that he knew it was fake. He gave me a tight smile and leant a little closer.

"You know that warehouse was SAMCRO."

"I don't know what you're talking about, deputy. Here's you coffee and have a nice day." I handed the two take out cups to him and smiled again. "Just out of curiosity, what does the warehouse have to do with Charming PD? It's out of town limits."

"I'm afraid police business is none of yours, Ms Morrow." He grinned at me, nodded at Billie and left again.

"What was that all about?" I muttered. "Billie, I'm gonna call dad from the kitchen."

She nodded at me and went back to her work as I dialled the number of the garage from memory. Since Otto had gone to jail, Billie and her brother had stayed pretty far out of the club's business and I could tell the visit had rattled her a little.

"Teller Morrow Garage."

"Mom? I need to talk to dad."

"What's wrong, baby?" She asked. I could hear her moving around and listened as she called out for Kip to grab my dad. "You alright?"

She was using her mother hen voice and I smiled at the sound of it.

"Yeah, Deputy Hale just dropped in for a coffee and to ask a few questions about the warehouse. I think he's heading up there now."

"Here's your dad."

"What's wrong?"

I repeated the entire conversation to him, word for word, and listened as he cursed.

"Yeah, your boy's snitch at City Hall told us he got a warrant to search. We'll take care of it, don't worry."

"Alright, be careful. I'll see you later."

"Okay, baby. Hey, your mom wants you."

"We're gonna do dinner. Tomorrow night. Tell Billy and Sean to come along, too." She told me.

"Sure, mom. See you then."

I hung up and stretched again. I had had a late night in the bar last night and not much sleep when I got home. My head was sore and my neck was aching and the visit from Hale had just intensified both pains.

* * *

My shift at the dinner dragged that morning. It picked up around 11 and I was kept busy as the only waitress on but the tips made it worth it. By the time two rolled around I was exhausted.

"Billie, I'm gonna head out. Mom's having a family dinner tomorrow night. You and Sean better be there." I called to her as I put my jacket on. "I'll see you tomorrow morning."

"Alright, sugar, I'll call you later."

The sun was shinning as I rolled the window in the car before starting it and pulling out of the car park. As I drove towards the centre of town I thought about Hale.

I was more involved with club business than a lot of the other women and hangers on but I didn't know everything. I did know, from listening to mom and dad and Jax, that Hale wasn't like Chief Unser. He was… a proper cop. He didn't take kick backs and he wouldn't have the same 'you scratch my back; I'll scratch yours' relationship that the club currently enjoyed with Unser.

I didn't know Hale personally either; other than in a passing nod sort of way. I had a bad feeling in my gut about this one.

I was about to take the turn off towards home when Abel's face popped into my head and I decided to go visit him. Maybe I'd drop by and see Juice on the way past. I pulled a U Turn in the road, honking the horn as I passed Opie and Piney. They were parker outside a store, facing each other on their bikes. They raised a hand in greeting as I passed.

Teller Morrow was crowded with workers and people waiting on their cars being fixed. I parked next to mom's car and climbed out. I waved at some of the workers as I passed, heading into the office first.

"Hey, mama."

"Hey baby." She didn't look up from her paperwork.

"I'm gonna go to the hospital to see Abel. You wanna come with?"

"I got a few things to work on here but I'm gonna go later."

"Alright. Is Juice around?"

"He was on the phone last time I checked. Should be in the garage. Better hurry, though, I think your dad was gonna call church."

I nodded and headed out to the garage. Juice was leaning against one wall, talking on the phone as I approached.

"Alright, thanks babe. Bye."

He hung up and I raised an eyebrow. "Babe? Who's babe?"

"Whose jealous now?" He smirked. He slid his hands around my back and down to my ass, pulling me against him. "Otto's sister. Trying to figure out if we're knee deep in forensics or what."

"Okay. Gimme a kiss." I demanded. He chuckled but complied, dropping a soft kiss against my closed lips. It started tame but as soon as his tongue slid against the line of my lips, I parted them. He turned us around so that I was against the wall and he was against me, his fingers sliding under my shirt to stroke my ribs. I slid my hands into the back pockets of his jeans, groping a little as he pressed his hips against mine.

"What the fuck are you… Jesus, I don't need to see this shit."

We pulled apart guiltily at the sound of Jax's voice. Juice removed his hand from my shirt and flushed, mumbling an apology.

"Shut up, jackass." I commented fixing my shirt and my hair.

"Clay's waiting on us in church. Get your dick away from my sister and get going."

Juice scuttled away with a wink in my direction and I glared at Jax.

"You're an asshole."

"Yeah, yeah. Listen, I dropped by to see the kid. Tara says it's all looking good with him. Said that the put Wendy into an induced detox or something. She'll be out for a few days."

"Yeah? That's great." I didn't even bother hiding the sarcasm and he smiled.

"I don't get why you hate her so much. Or why mom hates Tara so much. I'm a big boy, I don't need my mom and my baby sister looking out for my emotional well being."

"Sure you don't. And mom doesn't like Tara because when you were with Tara, you weren't the obedient little boy she was used to. Tara changed you sometimes."

I spoke without thinking and could have cursed myself when I realised what I'd revealed. Mom's opinion of Tara was well known but I was never sure if Jax knew why.

"Look I gotta go to church. Just check in on Wendy for me if you're there. Please." His please was sarcastic and I gave him the finger to show him that I knew it. He grinned and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

I headed back to the office again, smiling at Kip as I passed. Closing the door before I sat down, I cleared my throat to get her attention.

"Hey, mom, you never told me why you went into Wendy's hospital room."

"I went by to give her a choice." She replied. She looked me dead in the eye and I couldn't help but chuckle nervously.

"Mom, you could have been caught."

"Don't worry about me, baby. Stupid bitch couldn't even die right."

"Mom!" I had figured it out as soon as Jax sent me the text that night but I hadn't had time to confront her yet. I also hadn't been sure what to say. I knew my mom was a hard woman. I knew she was the most over protective person I had ever known, and that included my dad and Jax and Juice. She would do anything to protect her family and as much as I knew what she had done was wrong, I couldn't find fault with it. Wendy had almost killed my nephew. Bitch chose to OD.

"The stupid bitch not dying could lead them back to you."

She shook her head. "She won't tattle. She knows better."

"I hope so."

Church must have been short and sweet because I could hear the guys in the garage again. I looked at mom and sighed again.

"Be careful mom." I warned, before leaning over and kissing her.

I left the office and walked into dad.

"Hey baby. What are you doing here?"

"I figured I'd drop in on my favourite boys before heading to the hospital. You get the shit with Hale worked out?"

"Still working on it but we got a plan."

I nodded before heading to where Jax was standing with Juice, Kip and Chibs.

"Hello, darlin'." I grinned at Chibs as Juice wrapped an arm around my hips. I caught the look he shot at Kip and rolled my eyes, making sure he saw me. He would really need to get over this shit if Kip was gonna be patched in.

"Be careful." I told them. I gave all of them a kiss on the cheek, ignoring Juice's scowl as I included Kip.

"Love you." He murmured, pulling me in for a real kiss. I grinned at his jealous streak and allowed him to lift me a little.

"Love you too. See you later?"

"Yeah, baby."

The hospital was buzzing quietly when I arrived. The route to the children's ward was firmly ingrained in my brain by now and I walked it easily.

Tara was standing at the desk as I approached and she smiled at me.

"Hey, Mika."

"Hey."

"We haven't really had a chance to talk, with everything that happened with Abel."

"I know. I've been slowly going insane these past few days. How are you?"

"I'm good. Good."

Silence fell for a few minutes as we avoided each other's gazes.

"Look, Tara, when you left you really messed him up. I can't say I'm happy about it."

"I know. And I know you all think I'm back for him, but I'm not. My dad died and I finally decided it was time to clear out the shit."

I nodded slowly, noticing the way her eyes darted around a little. She was lying about something.

"Good. You know I always thought you and Jax were perfect for each other and I'm not opposed to helping the two of you along the way but…"

"Not right now?"

"Yeah. Not right now. Too much shit going down right now to worry about my brother's heart getting broke again."

"I get where you're coming from. So, what about you? Any guys get past Jax yet?"

"Yes, believe it or not. I'm pretty serious with one of the new guys in the club. Name's Juice."

"Juice? Really?" She raised one sceptical eyebrow and I laughed.

"Okay, his name's Carlos but he threatens to shoot you if you call him that." I corrected. "I'm thinking of getting the crow."

Tara nodded slowly, her smile slipping slightly. "That serious, huh?"

"I'm still not sure about it but yeah, we're that serious. He's a good guy. A real good guy, actually, compared to some of them. And he wants to ink me but… I'm just not sure, you know?"

It was amazing how easy it was to talk to her. Tara had been there through my formative years, before she had taken off when I turned fifteen. I had hung around her and Jax and Opie and his current girlfriend like a little puppy dog and she'd always been nice to me. She was like a mini mom. She'd taken me to buy my first box of tampons when I was thirteen (I lied and told my mom Billie and I had gotten them together) and she used to keep Jax occupied so that I could go out with boy friends. It never worked very well and because of that I never had a serious boyfriend until I turned sixteen and Jax had moved out.

"What are your doubts?" She asked carefully. She was the most level headed person I knew. My family, myself included, were all such hot heads. We jumped to conclusions and we got angry quickly and it never ended well when we fought. But Tara was different. She always thought things through; always weighed the pros and cons before making a decision about anything. It was a trait I had never been able to master.

"I'm worried it'll end badly. And I'll be stuck with this huge reminder of my mistake. And, of course, if I have a crow, what guy in Charming is ever gonna touch me? Juice can rebound with a few crow eaters, probably all at the same time, and I'll be stuck with no one."

"You know, you and Jax have that pessimist thing in common. You must get it from your mom." She said, standing slowly. "Sometimes you gotta have faith that things are gonna work out. Love can be something great… don't ruin it with doubts." She looked sad momentarily and I wondered if she was thinking about the relationship _she_ had ruined with her doubts.

"I gotta go. I need to check on a few patients before leaving. But I'll get your number off Jax and we can go for a coffee? Have a real catch up?"

"Sounds great, Tara."


	6. Seeds2

As always, i don't own the characters of the idea of Sons of Anarchy. I hope you like. Hopefully the next chapter will be up tomorrow. please review!

* * *

I woke up to an empty bed the next morning. I yawned widely as I reached for my ringing phone, the reason I had woken up so early on my day off.

"Hello."

"Hey baby. I got your messages. Got back late last night and couldn't find my keys to your house so I crashed at the club house."

Juice's voice was like honey in my ear and I grinned, stretching my legs beneath my sheet and yawning again.

"Everything go alright?" I asked, rolling over and glancing at my clock. It was almost eleven. I needed a shower before meeting mom for breakfast.

"Yeah… I guess so." He didn't sound too sure.

"So that's a no, then?" I guessed.

"Hit a few snags. Think we got it all sorted though and you Clay thinks he sorted out our Hale problem for at least another six months. We'll see, I guess."

"Sounds like a pretty successful day." I murmured. "Mom has requested the pleasure of your company tonight at their house. Big ol' family dinner."

"Jax mentioned something. Half the clubs heading."

"Yeah and the other half are sending their old ladies." I chuckled. "Mom's been doling out jobs since yesterday. I am officially her second in command in the kitchen."

"Second in command, huh? Sounds… sexy." I could hear his smirk down the phone and I grinned.

"Oh sure. Me in an apron with flour in my hair… what could be sexier?" I laughed.

"Depends, are you naked under the apron?"

"In my parents kitchen? I'm thinking not."

"Wow, way to kill the mood, baby." I laughed again at his disappointed voice.

"I gotta go anyway. Mom's treating me to breakfast… or lunch I guess. Then we're going shopping for some food. You gonna be in the garage all day? I might stop by later."

"I might not be here. Got an errand to run but I'll text and let you know. Love you sexy."

"Love you too, asshole." I grinned, before ending the call.

Mom was coming in a half hour so I had no time to heat the water but the cold spray felt good on my sleep warmed skin. I didn't bother drying my hair; choosing instead to stick it in a loose bun. I threw make up in my bag to bring to mom and dad's for dinner but didn't bother with it for lunch. My message tone beeped and I lifted my phone, smiling as I noticed Juice's name on the screen.

_Missed you lst nite. Wanted you so bad. Wish I had you against the wall in the kitchen…_

My stomach fluttered as I read and then reread the short message. I could practically picture him, leaning against the wall of the garage, his eyes hidden behind sunglasses as he decided what to text and a smirk on his face as he thought of my response. A lot of people didn't give Juice enough credit. What he lacked in common sense, he made up for in other areas, like computers and all things electrical. And damn but that boy could talk, or text, dirty.

I was still grinning as I sent my reply, just as mom beeped the horn from outside.

"Hey baby."

"Hey mama. Where are we heading for lunch?"

"Luanne and Billie are gonna meet us at Mike's. They're already there getting a table."

"Oh, okay."

I buckled in and began tapping my finger against the window.

"Stop it." Mom snapped after two minutes of the tapping.

"Sorry." I pulled my fingers back with a small smirk, placing it on my knee and concentrating on not tapping.

"Can't you smoke or something?" She asked irritably as I began drumming my fingers against my thigh.

"You're the only mother I've ever known who tried to convince her daughter to smoke." I chuckled. "Most tell their daughters to stay away from cigarettes, drugs, booze… and men who wear black leather and ride Harleys."

She smirked at me, an expression that perfectly mirrored the one on my face, before taking a drag of her own cigarette.

"How many mothers you known?"

I laughed as she parked the car, waiting patiently as she locked up the car and got her shit together. There wasn't really a need to lock the car up, since no one in town was stupid enough to try and steal Gemma Morrow's car, but she did it anyway.

Luanne and Billie were sitting side by side in our usual booth. There were as alike as my mom and I were different. Both with their blonde hair and tanned skin, both dressed in cut off shorts and white vest tops, with black bras underneath. I grinned as I slid in facing them.

"Are you two in a mother/daughter contest or what?" I asked. They looked at me and raised their eyebrows, almost identically, and I laughed again.

"Cute. Did you guys order for us? I gotta get to the grocery store before three or all the good shit will be gone. You're coming tonight, right Billie?" Mom asked, signalling to the waiter to bring us both coffees.

"Of course. Sean too, if he can drag himself off Blair for five seconds."

"Still in the honeymoon period, huh?" I grinned. Sean was Billie's twin brother and another good friend of mine. Being brought up in this life together, the three of us had bonded in middle school and been tight ever since. Sean had always had my back in school if anyway was stupid enough to pick a fight with me. Likewise, I'd had his; I had been his fake girlfriend and alibi more times than I could count. It had always surprised me that he hadn't prospected for the club yet, but he was still young.

"Mothers and their sons." Billie pretended to gag. "It's all about the boy, right?"

I nodded my agreement with a smirk. "Oh yeah. Jax gets all the love in our household. I'm like poor Cinderella in the background… working the bar, slaving over a hot stove…"

"Yeah, yeah, you'll survive." Mom chuckled.

We were silent as the waiter set our food in front of us. I smiled at my grilled cheese and fries, my stomach suddenly desperate for food.

"So, Mika, your mom and I wanted to talk to you about Juice." Luanne began. I looked up at her in surprise, a half eaten fry held between my fingers.

"Um, is this a long overdue sex talk? Because I gotta say, it's a little late." Billie smirked. I shot her a glare before turning my look on my mother and my surrogate mother.

"This isn't a sex talk, is it?" I asked wearily. Mom winked at me and shook her head.

"No, hon, we just thought we'd answer any questions you had… about being an old lady."

I looked between the two of them in astonishment. Were they serious?

"What questions would I possibly have?" I asked finally.

"You seem so hell bent against the tat. Why? What changed in the two weeks after Juice asked?" Billie asked softly. I glared at her, suddenly mad at the three of them. I didn't want to talk about my insecurities like this. I didn't want to tell them why I didn't want the tat because I knew what their reactions would be. They would exchange semi amused looks and sigh in false exasperation before assuring me that I was Juice's number one priority and what happened on a run stayed on the run. Nothing, or no one, would ever come between the two of us. But they were wrong. Because if Juice came back from a run after fucking some whore in another town we'd be through. There would be no turning the other cheek for me.

"Look." I started calmly. "I get that you guys are just trying to help and all, and I really appreciate it. But the tat is something I gotta work out for myself. I'm not getting it yet and…"

"Honey, you told your boyfriend you were allergic to needles to get him to stop pestering you. How long do you think that excuse can last? You think Juice won't mention it in the club house? You think your dad and Jax won't correct him and say you've never been afraid of needles in your life? You can't drag this out for much longer. Either get the tat or break it off with Juice." Luanne spoke softly and calmly and I gazed at her in annoyance. I didn't want anyone to point out the stupidity of my plan. I didn't want to be confronted with something that would happen in the future.

"Look, I tried to break up with, remember? It didn't work out so well. He followed me around like a puppy dog and threatened every fucking date I had."

"Because we all knew you weren't serious." Mom cut in. She took a long drink of her coffee and looked at me. "Juice is a good kid. He's not the brightest but he's loyal and he treats you good. He'll take good care of you in the future because if he doesn't I'll cut his balls off." I smiled at her imagery but she wasn't done. "I know you probably have this image in your head of Mr Right or Prince Charming and as your mom, I don't wanna be the one who crushes your dreams baby but he don't exist. Now, you're waiting on Juice to cheat on you and I can't guarantee that'll never happen. But I can guarantee that it's just as likely to happen in a relationship with a normal guy. Now if you're hell bent on not getting the tat, we can't force you. But don't use something that boy hasn't even done yet as an excuse."

I sighed and dropped my head on the table top. This wasn't a conversation I wanted to be having in a café with my mother, her porn star best friend and my own best friend, the porn star's daughter. It was like something out of a bad novel.

I knew they were right but I was so pissed off at everyone telling me that I had to get the tattoo and that all my reservations about it were silly that all I wanted to do was slam out of the café and ignore them for a while.

"Come on, baby. Let's go shopping." Mom held her arm out for me to take and without saying goodbye to Luanne or Billie, I led her out of Mike's. I wasn't trying to be rude but if I'd opened my mouth, I would have been.

She waited until we were in the car again before speaking.

"Mika, we're not ganging up on you baby."

"You sure? 'Cause from where I'm sitting, it sure seems like you all are." I snapped. "Everywhere I turn it seems like someone is shoving their opinion down my fucking throat. Even Jax. And he has a fucking nerve since he gave the tat to that crank whore."

"I know, baby. But we just don't want you to regret not getting it."

I was silent until we pulled into the grocery store.

"What if I regret getting it?"

She smirked at me as she locked up the car and we headed inside.

"No one regrets the crow, honey. Hell, not even the good doctor regrets hers, no matter what she says otherwise."

I shook my head but smiled. Mom had a point. I'd never met an old lady who regretted her tat. Sure, a lot of the guys had ex wives and ex girlfriends who were bitter and talked trash about them and the club but none of them had been given the crow.

"Just think on it." Mom told me as she began throwing things into her basket. I sighed and nodded in agreement.

"You see the kid?"

"Yeah. Looks a hell of a lot better now." I murmured. "Moving around more and shit. I spoke to Tara too."

"Oh?" She turned and gave me an appraising look and I returned it as well as I could. She was worried about something.

"Yeah. Just catching up shit. Gonna meet her for coffee one day this week."

"Oh." She nodded and went back to her shopping.

"This is?" I asked, looking down at her basket. I had expected more.

"Yeah. I still got a lot of shit from last week." She answered. I nodded and followed her into the line.

"Hey, there's Donna." I muttered, motioning towards the brunette who was at the front of the line, talking to the store manager. "Did he just refuse her cheque?"

Donna was a wild card in our little biker family. She had never really fit in as well as the other old ladies and I knew she hated how dependent she became on the club while Opie was in prison. She was a nice enough woman but she and I had never clicked. I knew she was good friends with Jax though and her and Opie had always seemed so happy before he went away. She was a lot friendlier back then.

I watched in silent pity as she began unpacking her shopping bag, glancing around her quickly, her cheeks flushing. She left quickly and I watched as mom quickly strolled past the other customers to the front, ignoring the sighing and curses that followed. I followed quickly, sending apologetic smiles to those I passed.

"What are you doing?" I hissed in her ear.

"Hey, can I pay for this?" She asked the server, motioning to the things that Donna had unpacked. She handed me a wad of notes and her own basket. "I'll meet you outside."

She grabbed the bag of groceries and headed outside calmly. I coughed uncomfortably and began unloading her basket. I was already at the front, there was no point moving to the back of the line again now.

By the time I got outside Mom was standing at Donna's car, talking in a low voice.

"Bring the kids, you might actually have a good time." Donna opened her mouth to speak and mom held her hand up. "Don't say anything else. My Martha Stewart's wearing real thin. You know where we live."

She turned and walked towards me and I shot Donna a small smile. She ignored me and shook her head, climbing into the car and driving away.

"You think that went well?" I asked, throwing the grocery bags into the back of her car.

"I don't know but that is one stuck up bitch."


	7. Seeds3

This one's a little shorter. Just an expansion of the last scene in the episode. Hope you all enjoy.

* * *

Mom had dropped me off at home again, saying she had to go talk to Jax about something. I had expected to go straight to the house with her but I climbed out without complaint, sort of happy to have a few hours to myself to think things over.

Three hours later and I was showered, changed, made up and ready to go again. I was no clearer about the tat and what I wanted. But I was starving. Juice had text earlier and told me he would meet me at mom and dad's so I was driving solo.

The car ride to my mom's was quick and easy and I was greeted by warm laughter and loud voices as I pushed open the front door. The stereo was playing softly in the dinning room and I headed straight to the kitchen.

"Hey baby." Luanne greeted me as if the afternoon had never happened and I hugged her in a silent apology.

"Hey Luanne." I replied. She smiled at me, all forgiven, and headed back to slicing and dicing. Billie stood a little further away, mashing something in a bowl and she raised an eyebrow at me as I headed towards her.

"I'm a bitch." I told her as explanation.

"I know." She retorted. "But you're my bitch and I love you."

"Did I hear that right?" Tig asked as he came through the back way. He raised an eyebrow at us and looked us up and down in approval.

"Out of my kitchen unless you're gonna help cook." Mom warned him, lighting a cigarette and passing it to Maria. Maria was one of the old ladies and as she reached to accept the smoke, I saw the crow on her inner arm and sighed again.

"So, Mika, I hear you and Juice on the right path again." Maria commented, stirring a bowl of pasta. I accepted the spatula from mom and began smearing icing over a cake that had been left on the side board.

"Yes, mam." I replied. "Bobby bake this?"

"Yeah. The only guy to contribute something, naturally." Mom commented dryly.

"Oh they're all contributing something." Billie chuckled. "Body odour and bad breath."

I laughed along with the other girls, feeling myself relax for the first time all day. I was getting so worked up over this tat thing. It was time to relax and enjoy dinner with my family.

"I think that's everything." Mom commented as she pulled the steaks out of the grill. She began heaping them onto plates and I grabbed the salad and pasta, making my way into the dinning area. The table had been extended but it was a tight squeeze. There was a seat for me between Tig and Juice and I slid into it happily, accepting Juice's kiss with a smile.

"Busy day, baby?" He asked, sliding a hand against my denim clad thigh. I nodded with a sigh.

"Busy enough. You?"

He exchanged looks with Tig and I shook my head. "Never mind, don't want to know."

Juice stood to accept the tray of corn that was handed to him, before passing it along the table. He snagged one for me and set it on my plate and I grinned at him in thanks. His arm draped along the back of my chair and I settled myself against him as everyone settled down to eat. Jax looked preoccupied with something and I shot him a reassuring smile when I caught his eye. He grinned at me and shook his head, obviously dislodging the thought because he turned to Chibs and the two of them started insulting each other loudly.

Billie sat opposite Jax, beside Bobby, and I could hear her describing something to him.

"So it's just the three of us in this old house, that Mika swore up and down was haunted, and we're creeping through the hallway because she's sure she saw something in the window and she suckered me and Kelly into going in with her. So we're creeping down the hallway, and Kelly's wearing the most awesome fucking boots but they're echoing all over the fucking house…"

I smiled when mom caught my eye and shook my head at Billie's hand gestures.

"You alright?" Juice's breath was warm on my ear and I shivered a little as I looked up at him. His eyes were wide, and dark and worried and I smiled softly. How could I possibly have doubted this guy?

"I'm fine, baby." I reassured him, reaching a hand behind his neck. He came easily, pressing his lips to mine happily and winding his fingers in my hair.

"Hey, not at the table! Jesus, what's with you two?" Dad shook his head in exasperation and I flushed as everyone started laughing.

"Young love. Don't you miss it?" Luanne nudged Maria. She chuckled.

"Nah. It's when you've had them under the thumb for a few years that the real fun kicks in." Maria retorted, shooting a grin at her husband. Luanne and mom laughed and I joined in, ignoring the outraged protests from the men at the table.

Dinner passed in this way, jokes and jibes flying all over the table, directed at everyone. Kip sat facing me and took the brunt of the guy's jibes but he took it with a good natured humour and I knew that when he was leaving he had a few new fans in my mom and Luanne. Even Billie was smiling endearingly at him as he took Tig's insults with ease, even replying to a few that made everyone laugh.

"Desert?" Mom asked as she cleared away the dishes.

"Bobby Elvis' famous sponge cake." Bobby announced proudly. "Best sponge cake in town."

"You put hash in it?" Jax smirked and the guys laughed. Mom smacked him on the back of the head and motioned towards Stevie, Maria's little boy who sat in the middle of the table.

"Ohh, the boy's in trouble." Billie joked with a wink in my direction.

"Savour the moment, babe, it doesn't happen often." I replied with a smile at my brother. His smile widened and he shrugged.

"I'm the favourite, baby sister, nothing you can do about it."

"I can smother you in your sleep." I said sweetly, causing laughter.

"You'd never get close enough." He challenged and I chuckled.

"I serve you alcohol, Jackie boy." I said, winking at Chibs as I used his nick name. "I can slip you a roofie and you'd never know the difference."

"You hear what kinda sick talk's coming from your daughter right now?" Jax asked mom as she returned with the cake. "I know we decided not to send her to the nut house but I'm thinking we should reconsider."

I threw a handful of carrots at him and laughed at the shocked look on his face before diving behind Tig as he returned the favour with what was left of his corn.

"Hey! Hey!" Mom yelled as I stood up and threw a handful of mashed potato at him. It landed in his hair and I laughed hysterically as it slid through the blonde strands.

"Your new look suits you." I taunted him.

"You're so dead." He threatened, standing and heading for me. I shrieked and headed for the kitchen, dodging him and standing on the other side of the carving table from him. We stood in silence for a few seconds, staring at each other before he dipped his hand into the salad bowl that had just been left in and began tossing tomato slices at me. I shrieked again and dipped my hand into the bowl and throwing whatever I could find at him.

"You two better be cleaning." Mom shouted from the other room. I started giggling as an onion landed on Jax's forehead and he joined in, holding his hands up in surrender. I dropped what was left back into the salad bowl and began picking tomatoes up from where they surrounded me.

"You alright?" I asked quietly. He shrugged and kept picking the food off the floor.

"I'm fine. Kid's getting better. Just waiting on Wendy waking up and seeing what the story is there."

"You think she'll wake up?" I asked carefully. He glanced at me and furrowed his brow.

"Yeah, Tara said she's just in an induced detox."

I nodded and sighed. "You mind if I get together with Tara? Catch up and shit?"

"Mind? Why would I mind?" He asked. We had stopped cleaning and now stood facing each other.

"It won't be awkward for you?" I asked. "I don't wanna do anything that'll make you uncomfortable."

He grinned and pulled me into a hug. I rested my head on his shoulder and let him tighten his arms around me.

"Nah. Me and Tara are cool. You and her were always close, she was your big sister. I remember that. You wanna get together with her, you go ahead."

"Okay."

We joined the others at the table again, both grinning widely and laughing as we picked food out of our hair and off our clothing.

"I just washed my hair." He groaned as he threw himself onto a seat next to Bobby and took a drag of beer.

"Aww, I'm sorry. That meant your next shower was scheduled for six months from now, right?" I grinned. He picked something up to throw at me but the look on mom's face stopped him in his tracks. "Who's the favourite now, huh?"

We eat desert peacefully, still bantering between us, and when I'm finished I rest my head against Juice's bicep. He's joking across the table at Kip and I'm guessing that they had to spend some time together over the past few days because there's none of the tension between them that had previously existed.

"Tired, baby?" He whispered. I nodded, watching as mom and Billie laugh at something that dad said. I felt my lips curve up in a smile as Tig pretends to be insulted by Maria's comments about his hair.

This was my family. These were the people I wanted to be surrounded by for the rest of my life. I wanted a lot more family dinners like this. I wanted to be able to rest my head on Juice's arm and feel his hands against my leg as he talked and laughed with his brothers. In a sudden moment of clarity I decided that I wouldn't dance around it anymore. I wasn't gonna make excuses anymore or act like I didn't care anymore.

I was gonna get the tattoo. Not today and not tomorrow. But sometime soon, I would be getting inked.


	8. Fun Town1

Next episode. This one was a little difficult for me to write so i apologise if its not as good as it should be. Also, i suck at writing smut so please excuse the sad attempt in this chapter.

I want to thank everyone whose reading and reviewing. I love you all. As always, i don't own the characters from the show and please read and review.

* * *

"I love me some cotton candy."

I snagged a little bit of Sean's cotton candy, shoving it in my mouth before he could reclaim it and shooting him a triumphant smile.

"You're such a bitch." He grunted, finishing the rest of it before I could steal anymore.

I linked my arm through his as we strolled through the brightly coloured carnival, smiling at the people we knew as we passed them.

"Hey, there's your mom. Let's go say hello."

Mom was standing with her arms around dad, talking to a couple and a kid I couldn't recognise from the back. They left before we approached and I grimaced as mom whispered something in dad's ear. They headed for the photo booth and I shot Sean a disgusted look.

"I don't wanna know."

"Ah come on, Mika, your mom's hot. I'd tap that." Sean grinned. I punched him on the arm. Hard. "Bitch."

"I'll hurt you worse next time you talk about my mama like that." I warned him. "Or worse, I'll tell my dad and you won't walk for a month. Hey, there's my baby."

Juice was jogging towards us, a smile on his face.

"Hey baby." He pulled me away from Sean, leaning down to kiss me. I grinned against his lips and wrapped my arms around his neck. "You seen your dad?"

"Him and mom disappeared into the photo booth. Jax and Tig and Bobby headed in that direction though." I motioned to behind Juice. "Why? What's up?"

He glanced behind me at Sean and shrugged. "Irish business."

I nodded and pulled him down for another kiss, smiling as he came easily. His tongue slid across my lips and I opened them for them, groaning slightly as his tongue slipped inside.

"Oh come on, you guys, I look like such a pervert standing here watching you."

I became aware of Juice's hand on my ass as I pulled away and he grinned down at me.

"You are a pervert." Juice commented. He squeezed my ass once, smiling when I shrieked, before pulling away. "I gotta go and find your dad. I'll see you later?"

"You bet." I pulled him down by the lapel of his vest and kissed him again before swatting him away. I admired him as he jogged towards the photo booth, following him at a slower pace.

"You love him…" Sean sang in my ear. "You want to hug him, you want to kiss him…"

"I want to punch you." I sang back. "I want to kill you."

He laughed and wrapped an arm round my shoulder as we reached mom. Dad waved as he strolled off in the direction Juice had went in.

"Hey baby, hey Sean."

"Hi mama."

"You two hanging around for a while?" She asked. I exchanged a glance with Sean and nodded.

"Yeah, a few more hours maybe. Take in the scenery. You wanna join us?" Sean asked, holding out his arm. Mom smiled up at him and slid her arm through his.

"Yeah, stud. You can buy me a coffee."

I trailed after them, smiling at the sight they made.

* * *

"Hey, you guys almost ready to leave? It's getting cold and I forgot to lift a jacket."

Night had fallen and with it had come the cool air and my vest top was doing little to protect me from the wind. Sean shrugged off his hoodie and handed it to me, shaking his head with a smile.

"You never carry a jacket." Mom commented wryly. "Don't come crying to me when you catch pneumonia and die."

"Don't worry mama," I replied sarcastically. "I'll go crying to daddy if I die of pneumonia."

She smirked at me and shook her head again. "I'm gonna grab a soda. You guys want anything?"

I shook my head and Sean agreed. We stood in silence as we watched mom heading towards one of the vendors.

"Tristan!"

I looked up at the sound of the voice.

"Isn't that rich man Oswald's old lady?" Sean murmured. I nodded and took a step towards her, wanting to know what was wrong and if we could help. Out of the corner of my eye I saw mom approaching, her cup held loosely in her hand.

"What's going on?"

"We can't find Tristan."

"Jesus… well she must be here somewhere." Mom commented, looking around. We approached them slowly, arriving at the same time Oswald did, out of breath from his running.

"She's not on any of the rides."

His wife broke down at that and the two of them headed off in the opposite direction.

"Okay, you two take that direction, I'm going this way. You know what Tristan Oswald looks like, right?"

I had a fleeting image of a teenage girl with long dark blonde hair. "Yeah, think so. Meet you here in half an hour?"

She nodded and strode off, purpose lined in every inch of her face.

"I pity the fool who gets in her way." Sean muttered before shaking his head. "Alright, Tristan Oswald. Let's go."

We searched everywhere. We took turns calling out her name and got no response. We ran into Oswald and his wife a few more times and each time they saw what we were doing, he shot us a grateful smile and held his wife a little closer. But by the time our half hour was up I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach and I wanted to throw up. We hadn't seen any sign of her.

"Something's not right." I murmured to Sean. "That poor kid is here… somewhere."

"God damn it." Mom cursed loudly as she seen us. "Nothing?"

I shook my head sadly.

"Shit. Shit! This ain't right. Something… something ain't right." She muttered. I nodded in agreement and followed her towards the parking lot. As we approached Sean's car I saw the Oswald's with deputy Hale and a few other cops.

"Wow. Money really does talk. If that had been one of us they wouldn't even have sent a patrol cop." Sean muttered.

"There's a little girl in there." Mom reminded him coldly. Sean nodded and shot me a wide eyed look and I shrugged as I climbed into the back seat.

"You ladies going home?"

"Yeah." We replied in unison, both our voices quiet. That was when I knew she was as worried as I was. My mom was a mom. No matter who it was or even if she knew them, she was protective. Oh sure, if she knew you and disliked you or if you were on her bad side for some reason she could be the biggest bitch. But when something like this happened... my mom was like a one lady neighbourhood watch.

Sean dropped mom off first and she climbed out without so much as a good night. There were no lights on so I assumed dad wasn't home yet. I bit my lip as I watched her go inside.

"She seems worried." Sean commented as he back out of the drive. I nodded and sighed.

"I feel sick." I told him, resting my head on the back of his seat.

"Told you not to eat all that cotton candy." He retorted.

"No, not that kind of sick. The kind of sick feeling you get when a little girl is MIA in a carnival full of out of towners. A pretty little girl." I told him. He pulled into the drive and I was relieved to see Juice sitting on the front step, smoking. He looked a little agitated when he saw Sean in the car but he stayed where he was. Juice could never quite wrap his head around the fact that Sean and I were purely platonic. He was always a little jealous, despite the fact that Sean had been seeing a girl called Blair for the past three months. That was twice as long as his relationships usually lasted but Juice didn't care. He was convinced Sean harboured some lustful feelings about me and was just waiting for the right minute to unleash them. And he never listened when I tried to explain that sex with Sean would be like sex with Jax; disgusting.

"You really think something's up?" Sean asked, ignoring the evil look he was receiving.

"I dunno… maybe it's paranoia, you know? I just hope they find her throwing up cotton candy or something. Or smoking pot with her friends or something shit like that. I just hope she's okay."

Sean nodded. "Me too. You'll be okay? Dumbo looks like he's in a shitty mood."

"Don't call my old man Dumbo, jack ass, or I'll shoot you." I retorted easily. "And I'll be fine."

I climbed out of the car, waving at Sean as he honked before driving round the corner. Juice still hadn't moved and I took a seat next to him, resting my head on his broad shoulders and inhaling the smell of smoke that clung to him. It was neither a pleasant or unpleasant smell. It was just how Juice smelt at night before he had a shower. It was a mixture of smoke, grease, sweat and the aftershave he had put on that morning before leaving.

"What's up?" I asked softly. He flicked the last of his cigarette to the ground and applied one foot to it.

"Irish are being dicks about the warehouse." He replied. "What's with the long face?"

"Tristan Oswald's missing. Her parents couldn't find her at Fun Town. Me and mom and Sean looked too and there was no sign of her. I'm just a little worried, I guess. What's dad's plan about the warehouse and the Irish?"

He shrugged. "Shit I dunno."

I wrapped my hand around his wrist and tugged him until he stood up. He was looking down on me now and I grinned at him.

"I think we need a distraction." I murmured. I unlocked the door and stepped inside. He was still standing outside, looking confused, and I smirked.

Slowly and carefully I threw my bag on to the table in the hall. Then, even slower, I slid my top over my head. I had foregone a bra but the sudden heat in Juice's eyes made it worth it. He was inside before I even really noticed he'd moved, and the slamming of the door echoed in the quiet night.

"Oh, that kind of distraction." He murmured against the skin of my chest. His teeth caught my nipple and I felt my entire body arch against him. He lifted me, suddenly, and carried me down the hall.

"I never did get you against the wall again." He muttered in my ear. I groaned loudly and tightened my grip on his neck.

* * *

Juice's arm was heavy where it lay over my waist. We had fallen asleep on the sofa, his body completely twined around mine. I was between his legs and my head was resting on one arm while the other was wrapped around my middle.

"Back to sleep, baby." He muttered to the back of my head, tightening his grip on me. I sighed but continued to struggle free, standing over him and admiring the view.

"Like what you see?" He asked sleepily. I grinned.

"Damn right, baby."

I stretched, wincing at the pain in my shoulder from lying in such a contorted shape.

"Come on, Juice. Let's go and sleep in a real…" I was cut off by the sound of the phone ringing. I glanced at the table and sighed when I saw it was Juice's prepaid.

"Hey, baby, your phone is ringing." I nudged him a little with my knee and shrieked in surprised when his hand shot out and wrapped around my leg, knocking me over. I ended up on top of him, staring down into his very awake, very happy face.

"Hmm." He murmured, pressing his hips to mine. We were both still naked and I flushed as a shiver ran through me at the feel of him, already hard, against me.

"Juice." I groaned, dropping my head on his shoulder. His hand slid down my back, feather light touches of his finger against my spine, until it came to my ass.

"I think you should get the tat right here."

"On my ass? I don't think so buddy." I laughed. "We agreed on the hip."

He stopped chuckling and looked at me seriously, still ignoring the phone. "Are you serious?"

"Serious about what? The hip? Yeah. I don't want a tramp stamp on the base of my back and I'm not getting it somewhere too visible. My hip seems… oh my God."

While I had been talking, Juice had managed to reverse our positions. He stared down at my now from his place between my legs.

"You're really gonna get it?" He asked. I nodded slowly, smiling at his happy expression. He pressed against me slightly and I felt my eyes roll back into my head.

"Oh … Juice… you gotta get the phone." I panted. His thumb stayed where it was, brushing back and forth against the damp heat between my legs. He still didn't acknowledge the phone, choosing instead to push inside me. My back arched and I groaned loudly at the sensation before lifting my hips to oblige.

Tired, spent and in even more pain than earlier, I watched as Juice finally answered the phone. I was still beneath him, curled against his arm, as he apologised to whoever was on the phone.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be in soon. Yeah, I'm leaving now. Alright."

He hung up the phone with a load groan and dropped his head onto my collarbone.

"I gotta go."

"Of course you do." I sighed. "I wanna check in with mom, anyway. See if she heard anything about Tristan."

"Tristan Oswald?" He asked softly. I nodded as he stood and stretched.

"Yeah. Why? You hear something?"

"They found her last night. At Fun Town. She was raped, baby. And beaten. Oswald's at Teller Morrow talking to your dad."


	9. Fun Town2

As always, i do not own the characters that you recognise. please read and review.

The diner was packed when I arrived for my shift, two hours after Juice had left me in the house with a promise to call as soon as he knew anything. As I pushed open the door to the diner, I could hear the rumours and speculation flying.

"Found her out behind one of the rides…"

"Face all busted up…"

"Police have no idea who it was…"

"Bet it was one of those bikers…" I turned to glare at Thelma Johnson, a woman slightly older than my mother. She was sitting at a table with her two daughters and the three of them were leaning across the table, pretending to whisper as they shot a look towards Big Otto's poster.

"Those bikers," I started loudly, drawing everyone's attention. "Don't need to rape a thirteen year old kid. They want sex, they get sex. And you, Thelma, might want to remember whose son went to jail for raping his girlfriend before airing your opinions all over town."

Silence followed my announcement and Thelma and her two daughters looked down at their table as I passed them, making sure to bang my bag off their empty cups as I passed.

"You really have to do that?" Billie asked quietly once I was inside the break room. I turned angry eyes on her and she took a step back before narrowing her own eyes at me.

"You know, the minute I heard that kid was missing I knew that someone, somewhere, was gonna blame the club. I just knew it. Something bad happens in this town and the shit always blows our way. And I'm sorry but there is no fucking way I'm letting anyone judge them for this. I'm not gonna let anyone accuse those guys of raping a thirteen year old girl because there isn't one of them that would." I spat out.

"Not even Tig?"

I turned and glared at Maddy. Maddy was a seventeen year old kid who had dropped out of high school and worked at the dinner part time and at the coffee shop part time. I had seen her hanging around the club house with an older crowd. Every time I saw her I tried to convince her to go home but she never listened.

"Tig ever sleep with you, Maddy?" I asked angrily. "Ever take you up on it when you flaunt your shit at him?"

"Uh… no." She stuttered, looking anxiously towards Billie. Billie shook her head at Maddy and I smiled coldly.

"That's because as fucked up as Tig is, he doesn't do kids."

I slammed my locker shut and tied my apron angrily before storming onto the floor.

I wasn't sure why I was so angry. My morning had started out well. Hell, my morning had started out fucking amazing. But then Juice had told me about Tristan Oswald. First I was numb. I felt so sorry for that kid. Then the anger began to set in. First I was angry at whoever had done this to her. I was so angry I wanted to cut his fucking dicks off and feed it to him. Then my anger shifted inwards. I was angry at myself, at my mom, at Sean and at the Oswalds themselves. We should have looked harder; tried harder to find her and maybe we could have prevented this. The guilt was like a brick in my stomach and it was making me lash out. I shouldn't have shouted at Maddy. I knew she hadn't meant any harm; anyone who knew Tig knew he was a little freaky with sex. But I couldn't stomach the thought of anyone thinking that he or Juice or my dad, Jax, Chibs… any of them had done this.

"Mika! Phone call." Billie called to me. I finished ringing a couple's lunch through and handed them their change before turning towards her.

"It's your mom." She told me, handing me the cordless phone and motioning for me to take it in the break room. "Try not to be too long. We're swamped."

"Hey baby. How you doing?" Mom's voice was soothing and I knew Billie had told her about my outburst. That was the problem with having such a close knit family; they knew everything.

"I'm alright, Ma. You hear anything?"

"Not yet. Boys are gonna look for the scumbag, see if they can get to him before the cops do. Oswald wants in on the find but I doubt he has the balls to do anything more than hit the guy."

"He'd better grow a pair then. Scumbag deserves to have his cut off." I growled. "Who does this to a thirteen year old, mom?"

"A sick fuck, honey. A sick fuck. And don't worry. If Oswald don't go through with it… well, your dad's pretty pissed too."

"Yeah? Good. So, Billie told you about my nervous breakdown?"

"She mentioned you gave that old bitch Thelma Johnson a verbal beat down. Good for you, baby. You never let anyone talk about our boys that way."

"She just looked so fucking smug, her and her two ugly daughters. I couldn't let them get away with talking like that. And she's a fucking hypocrite too."

"I know… hey, Mika honey, I'll call you back later. Deputy Hale just pulled up."

She hung up before I could ask what was wrong and I sighed.

"You wanna take the day off? I could… I could cover for you. If you want…"

I looked over at Maddy. She was dressed to leave, her jacket slung over her arm. She had a scared, sort of guilty look on her face and I sighed.

"Hey, Maddy. I'm sorry I took my temper out on you. I just… those guys are my family, you know? And I hate the thought of people accusing them of doing shit they wouldn't dream of doing. And I know Tig comes across as a sick fuck, but he's not that sick."

"I know, I know. I didn't even really think that." She hurried to explain. "I just got so pissed off at him ignoring me all the time and I was feeling snide and it just came out. I've been around these guys, you know. I know they don't go for underage pussy. Hell, they barely go for just over the legal limit aged pussy."

I smiled at her and shook my head.

"Honey, you need to get yourself a nice guy. Not a biker who'll fuck you for one night then pretend not to know you the next."

She smiled at me funnily and laughed. "Isn't your boyfriend both?"

She walked out before I could say anything else but I knew I had a smile on my face because with that one sentence she had cheered me up considerably.

My boyfriend was totally both.

* * *

I had my break two hours later. The diner had died down and it was just me and Billie. She was cleaning a recently vacated table and I was fixing a fresh pot of coffee.

"Hey, I'm sorry I started shit in the diner." I told her as she passed me. She shrugged a shoulder at me and I sighed. "Come on, Billie. Your dad's one of those bikers they were talking about."

"My dad's in jail." She reminded me with a cool look. I winced. Otto's imprisonment was always a touchy subject but I continued, glad the diner was now empty so that no one could hear that we weren't the perfectly tight knit family all the time they seemed to think we were.

"Yeah, but he's still one of them. If he wasn't in jail he'd be getting lumped right in with the rest of them. How'd you feel is some fat bitch was sitting there accusing your dad, your brother or your boyfriend of being a child rapist?"

"Well, I'll never know how I feel because, unlike your dad, brother and boyfriend – my dad's locked up."

I stared at her back for a few seconds before sighing. Billie was my best friend in the world but unfortunately, unlike her mom and brother, she could hold a grudge. And she had a very rarely seen grudge against the club for her dad's lock up. She never mentioned it and she never let it interfere with her interaction with the club but it was always there, simmering beneath the surface. She was a little like Donna in that respect, but with a much smaller stick up her ass.

"Whatever. I'm going on my break." I told her. Without waiting on a reply, I headed towards the break room with a cup of coffee in hand.

I grabbed my phone out of my bag and checked it for messages. Two voicemails and a few texts.

First voice mail was from Jax.

"_Wendy's out of detox. Could you do me a favour and check on her when you finish? I'd go by but I can't until this shit is cleared up."_

What shit? The second message was from Juice.

"_Hey baby. I'm on my way back to TM. Cops wanna interview all the sons that were at Fun Town. Think Hale's trying to keep us occupied so I don't know when I'll be done but I'll call you later. Love you."_

There was a text from Tara telling me about Wendy and one from mom saying the same thing. The other message was from an unknown number. It simply said who's this? I frowned at my phone before putting it back into my bag and unfurling a newspaper.

I sipped my coffee slowly and read the report about the rape. There was nothing interesting or new in it and I sighed as I stood up again. I had another three hours to go and I wasn't looking forward to spending them with Billie being a bitch.

I washed my cup in the sink and headed back outside. Billie was seated behind the counter, watching an older couple slowly eat their blueberry pie and drink their coffee. It was Mr and Mrs Rossi. They had lived in Charming their whole lives and Mrs Rossi had been my high school history teacher. She had retired a few years back but she always had a kind word for me when she saw me. Their home had been broken into by a couple of teenagers on crank a few years ago, while Mrs Rossi had still been teaching, and they'd given Mr Rossi a beating. Mrs Rossi had begged my dad to do something about it and he'd agreed. He'd found the kids and threatened them to within an inch of their lives and, shit scared of what the club would do to them, they'd gone and apologised to the Rossi's, given back the money they'd stolen and then got the fuck out of Charming. Mr and Mrs Rossi were one of the families in Charming that got what the club was doing with the town. Hell, they appreciated what the club was doing for the town. Compared to some of the bigger towns and cities nearby, crime in Charming was practically non existent, especially violent crime. There were no big chain stores edging out the mom and pop stores and kids could run around after dark without being afraid of something happening them. Or at least, they used to be able to.

Most people were thankful for the club. Thelma Johnson owned and ran a little furniture store on Main Street. If it wasn't for the club, Pottery Barn would have taken over a long time ago and she knew it. And normally she respected it. But with Tristan's rape and beating, everyone was willing to forget what the club had done for them and point their fingers our way. Assholes.

"Hey, I'm sorry about my outburst earlier."

I looked up as Billie bumped her hip against mine and shrugged.

"It's fine. I get it."

"No, you don't." She replied softly. "And that's okay. I don't want you to get it. I would never wish your dad being in jail on you, you know that. It's just… it's so stupid."

"Come on, blondie. I'm your best friend." I coaxed softly. Mr Rossi stood and made his way towards us and we grew quiet.

"How you girls doing today?" He asked, his old voice sounding like he had gargled with rocks. I smiled at him and nodded.

"Not too bad, Mr Rossi. How are you and the little lady doing?" I waved at Mrs Rossi and she beamed at me, waving back.

"Oh, we're good, darlin'. Terrible things happening in town, huh? Nothing like this happened in Charming in a long, long time."

"I know. I hope the poor kid's okay." Billie commented. Mr Rossi nodded.

"I hope the Sons get the bastard that done it. No one deserves to get away with taking a young girl's innocence like that." He smiled at us, a crooked smile that we both returned, before turning and making his way back to his wife. He helped her up, tucking her hand under his arm and they made their way out slowly, leaving Billie and me along again.

"So, spill." I commented, pouring two cups of coffee and setting hers in front of her.

"It's just… sometimes I see how angry you are about what people say about Clay and Gemma and I wish… I wish my dad was out, you know? I wish it was me that got to defend him the way you defended them this morning. I know, it's so stupid to wish that my dad wasn't in jail so that I could defend him to people who think he'd rape a thirteen year old but…"

"But you wish he was out. I get that, Billie. But you gotta stop taking it out on me, just because my dad isn't inside." I told her softly. She nodded.

"I know. I'm sorry."

She nodded at me and then walked towards the break room, telling me she was going to have a smoke over her shoulder.

My shoulders and feet were aching by the time I finished my shift and I was glad to pull my jacket over my arms at six thirty.

"That's me. I'll call you later." I called to Billie. She was talking softly to Sean and they both waved at me.

My phone rang as I slid into the driver's seat of my car and I frowned as dad's number flashed up on screen. He never called during the day unless it was an emergency.

"Hey, dad, what's wrong?"

"You seen your boy today?"

"Not since he left this morning. Why?"

"Nothing. He wasn't where he was supposed to be. Don't worry, he'll be around somewhere."

He hung up and I frowned at the phone. Where the hell could he have gone?

I shook the worry out of my head and backed out on to the road, heading for St Thomas. I had to check on Wendy and the kid and I told Tara I'd meet her for a coffee later. Mom was probably there too so I could ask her if she'd seen Juice.

Author's Note: my boyfriend's brother has borrowed my SOA dvds so i have no way of writing the next few chapters. i have Fun Town finished but that's it. Would anyone be interested in reading a pre-series Juice/Mika fic? Just until my dvds are returned and i can continue with the story. (fingers crossed its soon!)


	10. Fun Town3

This is the last chapter of this story for a few weeks. Look out for the pre series Mika/Juice fic. I'm gonna post it separately.

Thanks for all the reviews and please continue!

There were a few police officers milling around when I arrived at the hospital. I headed straight for Wendy's room, wondering what the hell I was supposed to say to the crank whore bitch that had almost killed my nephew. I stopped in my tracks with a frown as I saw Tara standing over the admissions desk, talking closely to David Hale. I stood for a few seconds before shaking my head and walking on. Tara would have known Hale before she left town, of course, but I didn't think they'd been close. It was something to think about. I liked Tara, I really did. But if I thought for one seconds that her loyalties lay with Hale, then I'd cut her out of my life. And I'd make damn sure she stayed out of my brother's too.

Wendy was alone in her room when I stepped inside, staring at the wall blindly. I coughed loudly to get her attention and she glanced at me, before looking away. I almost smiled at how awful she looked.

"Come to tell me what a crank whore I am?" She asked bitingly. Wendy had never liked me. Jax had obviously forgotten that the hate went both ways when he asked me to stop by.

"Why would I do that?" I retorted sarcastically. "You already know."

We fell silent for a few minutes and I sat in the seat next to her bed, dropping my bag beside my chair and crossing my arms defensively. The air in the room was stiflingly thick with tension and I had no desire to break it.

"Have you seen him?" She finally asked.

"Seen who?" I asked. She glared at me and I shrugged, letting her know that I wasn't going to answer.

"Have you seen my son?"

"You have a son? Who? Because I know you aren't referring to my brother's precious baby boy that you tried to kill." I spat angrily. She closed her eyes and her shoulders shook with sobs. I wish I could say that I felt guilty but I really didn't. I wanted her to feel the pain. I wanted her to feel as much pain as humanly possible because that's what she had put Abel and Jax through.

"Oh God… I'm so sorry." She sobbed. "So, so sorry."

I shrugged again, leaning back into the chair before standing with a stretch.

"Well, it's been a pleasure as always, Wendy."

"Mika! Wait… is he okay? Jax, I mean."

I glared at her before smiling sweetly. "Oh sure, he's great… he's even better when he and Tara are talking. Don't worry, Wendy, Jax'll be just fine."

With that as my parting shot, I left the room. I wasn't sure what I was going to tell Jax, other than I had made his wife cry. Again. Mom was walking down the hall towards me, a bunch of flowers cradled in her arm.

"You fall and bang your head?" I asked as she reached me. She smirked and kissed me on the cheek briefly.

"Don't leave without me." She told me. "I just want to talk to Wendy."

"Okay. I'm gonna see Tara anyway. I'll be around."

She went inside and I continued back to where I had seen Tara. I passed Mrs Oswald and Hale, talking heatedly outside a room with a closed door. Tristan's room. I shot Mrs Oswald a supportive smile as I passed but she ignored me as she continued to berate Hale. I shot him a smirk as I passed.

Tara was alone now, sitting on a bench and looking over a clipboard.

"Hey, Tara." I sat next to her, frowning as she jumped. "You alright?"

"Uh, yeah. Sorry. I got a prank call earlier and it has me a little jumpy." She smiled at me reassuringly. "How are you?"

"I'm alright. Well, I've had to listen to three separate people talking about how the rape had to be a member of the club."

Tara raised an eyebrow in surprise. "I thought everyone but the police in Charming just loved the Sons."

"Well, they do when they need something but when something like this happens…"

"Yeah." Tara fell quiet again and I shrugged.

"So, you wanna go for that coffee?"

She nodded. "Give me a few minutes?"

"Sure. I'll be with Abel."

She smiled and I walked towards my nephew's room. He was so adorable, his little blue hat and his eyes wide awake and staring around him.

"He's a beauty, huh?"

I looked at mom and nodded.

"You have a fun talk with Wendy?" I asked.

"Did you?" She chuckled. "Shit, I think Wendy hates you more than she hates me."

"She's never quite forgiven me for always mentioning Tara around her." I smiled. "You see Hale fighting with Karen Oswald?" Mom asked. I nodded.

"Yeah, why? You think it means something?"

"I dunno. I'll keep an eye on it, though. You hanging around for a while?"

"Me and Tara are going for a coffee. I'll see what she says about Tristan. Hey, have you seen Juice?"

She shook her head and I felt worry begin to well up in the pit of my stomach. She must have read it on my face because she smiled reassuringly.

"Don't worry, baby. If anything had happened to him, we'd know. He's probably at the clubhouse."

I nodded, not entirely convinced. "Alright. I'll be back in about an hour or so. You need a ride home?"

"Yeah, Luanne gave me a ride in this morning."

Tara rapped her knuckles against the door and I nodded at her, grabbing my bag and making my way out to her.

"You wanna go to the cafeteria or to the coffee shop?" I asked.

"Coffee shop? I have to get out of here for awhile." She suggested.

We walked to the coffee shop slowly, exchanging idle town gossip.

"Melissa Harris was in for a STD test earlier." Tara told me. "She said she'd been sleeping with… a member of the club. You should pass the message on to them about getting tested. She was negative but it never hurts."

"Melissa Harris is a liar." I snorted. "No one will touch her because they think she's riddled with STDs. Not even Tig."

Tara chuckled and shook her head. "God, town gossip is vicious."

"Didn't you miss it?" I asked with a chuckle. "All the assholes who think they know everything about you, just because they've heard some gossip about you."

"God no. Chicago was so big that almost no one knew who I was. And that suited me perfectly."

I nodded in understanding as we reached the coffee shop. We went inside and grabbed a booth, ordering our coffee before picking the conversation up. Just as I opened my mouth to reply to Tara's question about Juice, my phone rang loudly.

"Hello." I answered, shooting Tara an apologetic smile.

"Hey, Mika. Your dad said to call you and let you know that Juice is fine." Tig's gruff voice informed me.

"Then how come he isn't calling me himself?"

"He's asleep. He probably won't be home tonight but don't worry. He's safe."

"You're lying." I replied. "Is he with a crow eater?"

"Nah. See you."

I stared at my phone in disbelief.

"You okay?" Tara asked softly. I nodded. The conversation had left me confused. I wasn't sure if I should believe Tig or not but I was pretty sure Juice wasn't with a sweet butt.

"So, who was your crank call from earlier?" I asked, smiling at the waitress who set our coffee in front of us.

"Oh, uh, no one. Just a crank." She smiled nervously. She tucked her hair behind her ear and I frowned. She was lying.

Why was everyone lying to me all of a sudden?

"Oh, weird." I went along with it. "I got a random text earlier too. Just some number, saying who's this."

"That is weird." Tara nodded. Her eyes darted around the coffee shop and my frown deepened. "So you went to see Wendy? She say anything to you?" Tara changed the subject.

She knew about my mom. As she met my stare I knew, without a doubt, that she knew what mom had done.

"Wendy hates my guts." I told Tara with a fake smile. "All we did was fight a little."

"Wendy hates you? How come?"

I shrugged. "We just never got along. Too different, I guess. I don't think she liked how easy I had it with the club. How much I belonged, you know? And I hated how she started as a crow eater and made her way up. One minute she was sucking dick and the next she was at family diners. I hated that."

Tara nodded and we sat in silence for a few minutes. I wasn't sure how to proceed now that I knew what she knew. I would protect my mom at all costs and that meant not giving anything away.

"What was Chicago like?" I asked. "Did you have a boyfriend or anything?"

Keep her clear of the subject of Wendy and we'd be safe.

"Um, it was big." She chuckled. "A lot bigger than Charming. I loved it."

"How come you came home?" I asked softly. She shrugged and chuckled.

"Figured it was time to clear out dad's stuff and there was a vacancy at St Thomas."

"What about a boyfriend?" She looked nervous all of sudden and I narrowed my eyes as she bent her head to her coffee.

"No one serious. I was too busy working for anything more than brief flings."

I nodded in understanding although I was sure she was lying. Tara was turning out to be a lot more mysterious than she had been before she left.

I kept the conversation light after that and we were soon paying our bill. The walk back to the hotel was spent talking about shoes and when we got back we said our goodbyes. Tara was going inside to continue working but I had spotted Karen Oswald on her own by the doors and I headed in her direction.

"Hey." I spoke softly so that I didn't startle her but she still jumped a little.

"Hi… you're Clay and Gemma's daughter, right?" She asked huskily. She'd been crying pretty heavily if the red eyes and voice were anything to go by. I nodded and opened my mouth to continue but was stopped by mom's approach. She stood beside me, facing Karen.

"Had a little conversation with Tristan." Mom started. Karen looked angry.

"What? Why would you be talking to my daughter?"

"I told her I knew about the secret. She seemed relieved."

"What the hell did you say to her?" Karen looked angry but as I looked at mom I could see nothing but sympathy on her face.

"She remembers everything, doesn't she? You don't want the trial, the messy press… you just want to sweep it under the rug."

"Don't you judge me." Karen scowled. Mom shook her head slightly.

"I'm not judging you. You don't know me and I got no idea what it's like to be you. But I know something about burying the truth and it's a burden you never want to put on a kid…"

I stood aside as mom spoke softly, but strongly, to Karen. It was as honest as I had ever seen mom be with a stranger and I could see it having an affect on Karen as she explained her actions.

"Sweetheart, in her head… she'll always be the girl who was raped at Fun Town. The only thing worse than everyone knowing is no one knowing."

Karen nodded, tears streaming down her face. She was silent for a few seconds as we stood there.

"It's was one of the carnival guys. A clown, Tristan said. A fat clown."

Mom nodded and I shot Karen a sympathetic smile that went unnoticed until mom started tugging my arm.

"You're doing the right thing." She told Karen. Karen ignored her, wiping her face hastily, as if she was ashamed of breaking down.

"We gotta get to Jax, quickly." Mom told me quietly as we stepped past a police officer on our way to the elevator. "Gotta tell him what happened before Karen tells Hale."

I stopped suddenly and felt around in my bag. Sure enough, there was the small army knife dad had made me start carrying when I was old enough to start going out at night.

"Go on up." I told mom. "I'll meet you there."

I strode purposely down the hall, ignoring the looks of the police officer as I passed him again. The night air was cold against my skin as I made my way towards the car I knew was Hales. I hesitated briefly before thinking of the fat clown who had raped Tristan Oswald. If Hale got to him, he'd go to jail for a few years. It wouldn't be life and when he got released, he might to this again.

Bearing that thought in mind, I slid my knife out of my bag, looking around. I was alone outside but I wouldn't be for long. I stuck the knife in before pulling it out again and then doing it a few more times until the air in Hale's tire was released. I smiled at my handiwork and turned a grin as I heard Jax's low chuckle behind me.

"Thanks sis." He called, jogging towards his bike. "Get out of here."

I sprinted quickly around the corner, watching as Hale came striding outside and I heard his loud curse and smiled.

"Good night boys?" I asked softly as they filed into the club house. It was late and the bar was empty except for two others sons and their old ladies. They sat at a table in back, talking and laughing although that came to an abrupt halt when the others walked in.

"The best, baby." Dad told me as he passed. He dropped a kiss on my hair and smiled. I handed him a beer with a smile before handing the rest out. Kip smiled happily at me as he accepted his and I guessed he was in on the hunt.

"Hey, what have you done with my boyfriend?" I asked Tig, withholding his beer. He smirked, his eyes lighting up with humour and the others laughed loudly.

"Don't worry. Big baby will home in the morning." Tig replied.

"Big baby?" I asked suspiciously.

"Yeah… big baby."

I raised an eyebrow at Jax as he approached. He didn't look massively happy but he accepted his bottle of beer easily.

"I dunno, sis. Hey, nice work with the tires." He sat at the bar and watched the rest of the sons spread out.

"I had to help somehow. You get the dick?"

"Yeah."

"He gone?"

"Yeah."

I nodded and Jax stood. "How'd it go with Wendy?"

"The same way it always goes when you put the two of us into a room alone with each other, Jax." I told him softly. "Not well."

He nodded and took his beer, heading into the dorms.

I watched the boys relaxing and took a sip of beer. I hoped that wherever Juice was, he was okay. God help Alex Trager if he wasn't.


	11. Patch Over

I finally got my DVDs back! Yay!

Anyway, this is the next chapter. I'm only gonna post one chapter for Patch Over and i hope you like it. It was hard to write because i didn't want to make Mika too easy when it came to letting Juice do what he wanted on a run so if you think i did, let me know.

as always i dont own the characters you recognise.

"Hello." I slid the coffee I was holding onto the counter and pressed my phone to my ear before I hit stop on the music that was blaring through my small house and pushed myself up so that I was sitting on the counter.

"Hey sis, it's me."

"Oh really? I totally didn't get that from the hey sis." I remarked with a grin. I stretched my legs out in front of me, admiring the deep blue polish on my toenails. Billie and I had gone for pedicures yesterday and I was rather pleased with the result. "What's up, Jax-ass?"

"You haven't called me that in years, cute." He chuckled. "Listen, can you come by real quick, I wanna talk to you and not over the phone."

I froze in my leg swinging, wondering what could have happened that meant even the prepaid wasn't safe.

"I'll be there in thirty." I promised.

"See you."

I hung up and pushed myself off the counter, heading for my bedroom as I dialled Juice's number.

"Hey baby." He answered and I could practically hear the smile down the phone.

"Hey what's happening at TM? Jax called, sounded worried. Asked me to drop by."

"ATF." Juice replied. "You coming in now? Can you grab us some food? We're swamped and I can't see Clay letting someone go out."

"Umm, Jax wanted me ASAP but I'll go out and grab you guys food when I'm done, okay?"

"Okay. I'll see you when you get here."

I hung up again, worry now coursing through me. I threw a sundress over my bikini and slid my feet into a pair of flip flops, running a comb through my hair as I brushed my teeth.

I was in the car in less than ten minutes, singing along to the radio as I sped through the streets of Charming.

TM was bustling with people as I pulled in, parking in my usual spot and grabbing my bag and my phone off the passenger seat.

"Hey dad, you seen Jax?"

Dad looked up from the car he was looking at and nodded towards the club house. I nodded and headed inside, waving at Juice as I passed him.

"Jax?" I called, wrapping my knuckles against his door. I was not going to walk on in; I had learnt never to walk into one of the dorm rooms without knocking the hard way.

"Hey." He greeted as he opened the door. I pushed past him, settling myself on the bed.

"What's going on? Juice told me about ATF." I told him. He rolled his eyes.

"I'm gonna have to gag him."

"He didn't actually tell me anything," I reassured him. "He literally just said ATF when I asked what was up. Care to elaborate?"

"ATF agent's in town. Dunno what he's here for but it's gotta be us and the warehouse fire."

I nodded in understanding. "You think Hale called him?"

"I think he's pissed that Clay convinced Unser to stay on for another six months and this could be his way of punishing us. Doesn't even matter. All that matters now is that he's here and we got no where for the guns."

"Shit." I cursed softly. "But what can I do?"

"Nothing bout that." He chuckled. "But I'm heading up to Indian Hills to see the Devil's Tribe about keeping them for a while."

"You're dad knew the pres right?"

"Yeah, they were close. Served together. He owes us. Anyway, while I'm gone, can you keep an eye on the kid for me?"

"Of course. Mom will too."

"I know. But I wanted to make sure you were there too."

"Sure, sure." I nodded. I stood again, wrapping my arms around him quickly. "Be careful, bro. Nevada's big Mayan territory, right? I don't wanna have to bury you."

I looked him in the eyes. "Watch your back. Who's going with you?"

"Bobby. And you're boy and Tig are driving the shit if we get the go ahead. I'll be fine, sis, don't worry. You're turning into mom."

I laughed and smacked his chest lightly before heading for the door. "I'm gonna go and grab food for everyone, you want some before you go?"

"Nah, I'm good. We're hitting the road soon."

"Alright, bye. Have fun and don't catch any STIs this time."

I closed the door before the golf ball hit me and laughed loudly, heading back out to the lot.

"Hey baby." I pressed myself against Juice's back, sliding my hands under his shirt and scratching his stomach slightly, savouring the way he stroked my hand slightly with his much rougher one; it was like the calm before the storm.

"Hey." He turned with a smile, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and pressed his lips to my hair. "You alright?"

"Yeah, Jax just wanted to make sure I'd keep an eye on Abel." I told him. "You planning on telling me you were going to Nevada?"

He looked at me guiltily and I sighed. This would be his first long term run since we'd gotten back together and dread was beginning to pool in the pit of my stomach.

"I won't do anything, baby, I swear."

I shook my head, dropping out from under his arm.

"When are you going?"

"Tonight or tomorrow I guess… Mika, come on, don't pull away again."

He reached out and grasped my arm, pulling me into him again.

"I promise…"

"Don't Juice." I shook my head. "Just… don't. Don't make promises you can't keep, okay?"

I pulled away again, wrapping my arms around myself.

"What do you want for lunch?"

"Mika…"

"Jesus, Juice, just tell me what you want for lunch, okay? I need to think."

He looked so hurt that I wanted to hug him but I held myself back, balancing on the balls of my feet.

"My usual." His voice was small but I couldn't think about that now. I nodded and turned away, heading towards the small group of men clustered around the car.

"Hey, guys, I'm gonna do a food run, you want?"

"Take money out of the office, baby." Dad told me, before I was bombarded with orders.

As I climbed into my car again I felt tears well up in my eyes. I wasn't new to this shit, I knew that the time would come for him to go on a long run. He'd gone on runs before, while we were dating, but he'd always sworn to me that nothing had happened and since we weren't at the tattoo stage yet, I'd always accept that without really giving it much thought. Now, though, would be different. He'd be going on a run with Tig and that was the last person I'd want him to be with. Tig who fucked three or four different girls a night on a run and who had no real concept of fidelity. If Juice went to Nevada with Tig, Tig would push him towards the crow eaters and Juice would do it for approval. And because everyone else was doing it. He wouldn't stand there and be the only Son not fucking someone.

And I wanted to drive back to the garage and forbid him from doing it. I wanted to tell him, plain and straight, that if he fucked someone else then we were done- for good this time.

But I couldn't. Because if I gave him an ultimatum and he didn't stick to it, my stupid Morrow pride would force me to leave him and I didn't think I could do that. I had gotten used to waking up with his arm draped heavily over me and I liked the sound of his off key singing in the shower as I lay in bed at night. I loved how he made me dinner after a double shift or how he indulged my old movie obsession and sat through them without much complaining. I loved watching him working on a laptop, loved the way his fingers flew over the keyboard and the way he bit his lip when he was concentrating. And I wasn't sure another guy would ever managed to map my body the way he has; I didn't want to have to teach someone else where to touch me and how much pressure to apply or how hard to bite and suck… Juice knew exactly what to do to me and I loved it. I loved him. There was so much about him that I didn't think I'd ever find in another guy.

But how could I accept that he was out there fucking someone else? In my head, I could accept that as far as he was concerned, the girl he was fucking was just as tool. To him it was just like using his own hand. He didn't care about her, would never see her again… but I didn't know if that was enough. What if he found one he could go back to over and over? What if he found one he connected with? One he could come to love more than me? What if I was quite literally pushing him into the arms of another woman? My heart couldn't accept that.

SLOBs wasn't the place I normally got the boys lunch from but I found myself swinging into the parking lot and killing the engine. I slid my sunglasses over my eyes to hide the redness and climbed out, grabbing my bag on the way.

Billie was behind the counter serving and I could see Sean cooking out back. I slid through the employee door, smiling tightly as I passed co workers.

"Hey, babe, what are you doing here? Don't you get enough when you're working here?" Sean chuckled, not looking away from his grill.

"Juice is going on a run. To Nevada." I muttered, setting myself on a counter. Sean turned to look at me before slamming his hand down on the bell that signalled an order was ready. Billie came to the hatch and grinned in at me.

"Hey girlie, what's shaking?"

"Juice is going on a run," Sean told her quietly. "To Nevada."

Billie looked at me, her face softening and I felt tears well up again. I was being so fucking stupid and brining everyone down with me.

"Come here, baby." She murmured when she entered the kitchen. I pressed my face against her, ordering myself not to cry but finding comfort in the familiar smell of my best friend. A few tears slipped out unnoticed. "Shh, it's alright."

She rubbed my shoulder and took the piece of paper with the orders on it out of my hand, silently passing it to Sean.

"I'm just so fucking stupid." I finally said. "I knew this would happen… it's just been so long that I got used to having him with me, you know? I don't have to worry about him in the clubhouse because those whores know better but the ones in Nevada? How the fuck am I supposed to scare them into not touching him?"

"I know, I know." Billie agreed softly. "You gotta think for yourself, Mika. You gotta decide if you can live with knowing what he does on a run."

"I don't know." I admitted. "I don't fucking know. I mean, I know it happens. I know my dad's done it and Jax has done it… hell, even Opie's done it on Donna. And I get that they're all… okay with it, I guess. But, Billie… what if he finds someone else? What if I'm giving him fucking permission to leave me?"

She chuckled and shook her head. "Mika, that man loves you. Fuck, more than that he worships you. I get that he'll probably get some pussy on a run, but it'll be because he can. Because everyone else is doing it and because it's easy. It won't be because he's not satisfied at home, or because he wants a new girl or whatever… he's not gonna leave you for someone who has no self respect and gets her kicks by blowing bikers in a fucking dive bar. You're smart, you're sassy, you're fucking hot and you're his old lady. And if you tell him not to do it, he'll try his fucking damnedest not to."

"I know." I nodded. "But what if that's not enough?"

"It happens." She shrugged. "It's up to you to decide if you can live with it."

I nodded again. "I don't know if I can."

"Take Nevada as a test run." Sean suggested, setting a plastic bag beside me with the orders. "Lay down the rules and see what happens because unless you're willing to split with dumbo now, that's all you can do."

I groaned and shook my head. "I hate this. I hate that he has this affect on me. No one else ever got to me like this, you know."

"That's because you never loved anyone else." Sean reminded me with a smile. "Now scoot. I don't want your dad yelling at me because his subs cold."

I grinned and hopped down, grabbing the bag and my change on the way.

"Thanks guy. Don't know what I'd do without you both."

I gave them both hugs as I passed, rushing out to my car.

As I drove back towards the clubhouse I thought about what they'd said. I had to lay down ground rules, I decided. And make them crystal fucking clear.

TM was still busy when I got back, climbing out and shouting that lunch was here. I sat the bag on a picnic table out front and took a seat on another one, watching as the boys swarmed the food. I could see Juice beside Happy, describing something to the taller man and making him laugh. He glanced at me every few seconds, frowning before looking away.

"Wanna hear a funny story?"

I jumped a little as Tig breathed in my ear. He took a seat next to me and grinned as he took a bite of his burger.

"Do I have to guess the story?" I asked sarcastically, rolling my phone between my hands. Juice was looking over at me, his eyes darting between me and Tig as he bit into his sub. I was glad I kept my glasses on because at the worried look on his face I wanted to cry. Again.

"Prospect thinks Gemma's a MILF."

I chuckled lightly. "My mom's a total MILF. You disagree?"

"I ain't going there, sweet cheeks." He grinned. "Prospect announced said compliment in front of Clay."

My eyes widened as I took in what Tig had said. "No shit? Prospect still Half Sack or is he down to none?"

Tig laughed loudly and shook his head. "Nah, total silent treatment. I think Clay's deciding what the best revenge would be."

I grinned, looking around for Kip. He stood inside, looking out at the group of bikers who were happily munching on their food and laughing. He looked so lonely that my heart melted a little before the humour of the situation came back to me.

"Jesus, where do you guys pick up these prospects?" I asked with a sigh. Tig shrugged before hopping down from the table.

"Later, sweetcheeks."

"Whatever, asshat." I called back with a smile. Tig's story had cheered me up and I motioned for Juice to come over.

"You okay?" He asked as he took Tig's empty spot. "I'm sorry, baby."

"You haven't done anything… yet." I reminded him softly. "Look, Juice, I don't know how I'm gonna handle this, okay? I know you say you've never cheated on me and I'd like to belief that but… I can't. I don't buy that you've never fucked someone on a run before but I love you for trying to deny it and save my feelings. But from now on, I need the truth. I don't want details, names… anything like that but I want you to admit if you've done it."

"But… then you'll leave me." He said softly. His hand was on my leg; his warm, dark skin contrasted by the whiteness of mine. He was drawing little eights on my thigh with his thumb and distracting me but his hand tightened when he mentioned me leaving.

"No. At least… I don't think so. Juice, me leaving the first time was a mistake, okay? I was miserable and none of those assholes I went out with were good enough because none of them were you." I looked up at him, biting my lip as I thought of the best way to do this. "I love you. More than anything and I trust you with my life. But I know that you'll… you'll stray while you're on a run. And I'm not okay with it, not by a long shot, but I won't leave if you admit it. I want you to be honest with me, Juice. Completely honest. If you fuck someone, at least let me know."

He nodded slowly. "I'll try not to."

I shook my head. "No you won't. Please don't make promises you can't keep, baby."

He cupped my face in his hands, reaching down and kissing me softly before deepening it with a groan. His fingers twined in my hair and he tugged my face closer.

"Come on!" I heard my dad exclaim from behind us and we broke apart. "Jesus Christ. Juice, hurry the fuck up and get back to work."

He walked away, muttering to himself and shaking his head and I grinned before looking back at Juice.

"I got some rules Juice. No girl more than once, no names, no numbers… if you come back with a fucking bite mark or nail marks I will end you. And for the love of God make sure you use protection or I am never touching you again… got it?"

I kept my voice strong and harsh because if I wavered even a little, I'd fail and I'd cry. He was looking at me with a strange expression on his face. "I love you, you know. You've nothing to be jealous about. Those girls… they're nothing more than entertainment. You told me that once and you were right."

I shrugged, tearing my gaze away from him.

"Baby, when I'm with them, I'm thinking of you any-"

"Don't." I snapped, whirling back to face him. "Don't taint what we have with what you do with those whores."

I slid off the table, dusting myself off.

"Be careful out there. Have fun."

I went to walk away but he grabbed my arm.

"I hate how much it hurts you." He murmured. "I know you've been crying over me and I fucking hate it."

I nodded, not trusting my voice and slid out of his embrace. "You'd better get back to work."

"Mika…"

"Just go back to work, Juice."

I headed towards the office, desperate to be away from the eyes that I knew were watching me before the tears finally fell.

"Hey baby." Mom said as I slammed the door behind me. I took my usual seat and just stared at the wall.

"The first run's always the worst." She remarked softly. "You go crazy, wondering what he's doing and who he's doing it with… but it gets easier, I promise."

I nodded, not really feeling any better.

"Any word from the guys?"

I looked up from the paper I was reading in the break room and nodded. Billie threw her apron across the back of the small sofa and sat down.

"Patched over the Devil's Tribe and had a showdown with the Mayans. Everyone's fine and they should be home soon." I told her. "I heard that from Jax. I haven't spoken to Juice since the night he left."

She nodded. "You worried?"

I shrugged. "A little. I guess the worst bits the wondering, you know? I'm constantly stuck wondering what's he's doing and who he's with… it's giving me a constant fucking headache and I just want him to come home."

"It'll all be over soon, they gotta be heading back, right?"

"Should be." I nodded. "Thanks for the other day. You're my fucking girl."

"I know, I know." She smiled, standing up again. "I gotta go. I told Sean I'd go shopping with Blair for a birthday present for mom."

I chuckled. "Tell her I said hi."

Billie left quickly and I was alone again. I had begun reading an article on the Kardashians when my phone buzzed. I smiled when I saw Juice's name flash on the screen as I hit answer.

"Hey." I sighed.

"Hey baby." He answered. I frowned as I heard the hesitant tone in his voice.

"What's wrong?"

"I gotta stay here for another few days." He mumbled it so quickly that it took my a few seconds to decipher what he'd said.

"What? Why?"

"I don't wanna say on the line. But it's just a few days, baby, a week tops."

"It's already been a few fucking days, Juice." I reminded him softly. He sighed down the line and I echoed it.

"I'm sorry." He murmured and I felt like shit because I knew he wasn't staying out of choice. Dad must have given him the order.

"Yeah. I gotta go, I'm in work. Call me later if you're not too busy." I remarked bitterly. I hung up before he could answer and decided I hated myself as I threw my phone against the floor angrily.

This was why I never wanted to date a biker.


	12. Giving Back

No Juice in this episode :( so it's not a long one. Again, sorry for the long absence and i'll try to make sure i don't leave it so long in future.

plase read and review and as always i don't own the characters you recognise.

"Hello?"

"Hey baby."

I dropped onto a bench, waving Billie's concerned look away.

"Hold on a sec," I murmured into the phone. I placed it against my shoulder and looked up at Billie and Luanne.

"It's Juice. I'll follow you guys in a few minutes, okay?"

Luanne nodded. "Alright. Meet us at the chilli stand."

I nodded and watched as they weaved their way through the crowds of people before placing the phone against my ear.

"Hey." I said softly.

It had been a little over a week since Juice had gone to Nevada and despite the numerous phone calls, I missed him like crazy. It was the longest we'd been separated since we started going out and I found that I didn't like being away from him at all. Even during our brief separation, I'd still seen him in the club house and at family dinners and in the garage. Back then, I'd been desperate to get some time away from him but now it was just making me miserable.

"What are you doing?"

I trailed my fingers along my denim clad leg as I looked around me. Even the sound of his voice down the phone line was sort of distorted and fake. It lacked the warmth and humour of Juice's voice and I hated it. I hated this whole fucking thing.

"I miss you." I muttered softly, scowling as he chuckled a little.

"I know, baby. I miss you too. Just a few more days."

We fell silent for a few minutes and I leant back in the bench, closing my eyes and sighing.

"So where are you?" He asked.

"At the Taste of Charming fundraiser. Gotta help with the SAMCRO chilli booth." I told him with a small smile. "Mom's acting like Hitler."

His chuckle made butterflies swirl in my belly and I found myself smiling like an idiot. God I wanted him to come home.

"Everything alright with the club? I haven't heard anything except for a couple of texts."

"You ever hear of a member got ex-communicated? Called Kyle?"

"Yeah, Op's get away, right? He pussied out and got Opie caught."

"Yeah… well he's here."

"You're shitting me? How'd that happen?"

"His kid's band is playing tonight and the boys put it up to a vote. Jax said Opie wanted to see him here; see if he was suffering without the club." I sighed as I turned my eyes to where my brother sat with Opie, both their eyes trained on the ex member of the club.

"And is he?"

"Suffering isn't the word I'd use." I snorted. "He's here with a girl who looks like she's about fifteen and still wearing a training bra."

"You're such a bitch, baby." Juice laughed. "I love you."

"Yeah, I love you too." I smiled. "How's it going in Nevada?"

"Slow. Slow and boring. These guys are all so fucking old I'm afraid if they try to have fun their hearts'll give out."

I laughed loudly, ignoring the looks I received from people nearby. Juice really did sound bored out of his mind and I loved it.

"My poor baby." I crooned in mock sympathy. "No sweet butts keeping you company?"

I kept my tone light but my fingers were clenched on my knee and I had bit down, hard, on my lower lip as I waited on his reply.

"Baby, I meant what I said." Juice told me gently. I could practically picture the soft look on his face, a look that I was pretty sure I was the sole receiver of. "I'm not gonna do anything that could fuck you and me up. None of the whores here have anything on you. But I gotta tell you… when I get home, you won't be able to walk straight for a fucking week."  
I felt a shiver run down my spine at the promise in his voice and I couldn't help my giddy smile at his reassurances.

"Promise?" I smirked even though he couldn't see me.

"It's a guarantee baby."

"I'll hold you to that." I told him with a small laugh. "I better go. My mom's glaring at me from the chilli stand. I've been under house arrest for this entire week. I'm never left alone, I swear it's driving me crazy. I think they've got me on a damn suicide watch."

"They just care about you, babe." He reminded me. "I should be home in a few days but I'll call you tonight maybe."

We exchanged a few more goodbyes before hanging up the phone and I stood with a stretch. I strode across the grass, passing Opie. I smiled up at him but his expression remains serious, his eyes focused on the door of the building nearby. I followed his gaze and saw Kyle and a teenage boy head inside and I shook my head. I slid a hand around Opie's wrist and squeeze lightly in support before continuing on to the booth.

"Well you look happier than you have all week." Mom commented as I ducked into the booth.

"Phone sex will do that to a person." Billie joked from where she was serving an older couple. They shot her disgusted looks and she shrugged, turning away to take the next order.

"I just saw Opie heading into the building after Kyle." I told mom in a low voice as I accepted the rubbish bag she handed me. "He did not look happy."

Mom cursed and looked around. "He better not be starting any shit with all these people here. I don't care what shit went down."

"Op knows better." I reassured her. "He probably just wanted to talk."

"Talk… yeah, sure." Mom shook her head, glancing around once more before turning to the queue of customers.

I hefted the bag over my shoulder and strode towards the huge dumpsters that were lined up along the chain link fence.

"Hey Mika."

I turned and smiled at Tara.

"Hey, how are you?" We hugged briefly before I pulled away, glancing across to make sure my mom was still busy serving.

"I'm good. A couple of the nurses mentioned this at the hospital yesterday and I figured I'd stop by. Your mom really has out done herself."

I ignored the sarcasm and nodded. "I'm thinking of petitioning her for sainthood."

Tara laughed and shook her hair out of her face.

"Listen, I'd love to stay and chat but I was late arriving to help out and if Saint Gemma finds me slacking, there'll be hell to pay." I smiled again. "Give me a call and we'll go for coffee or shopping or something."

"Yeah, sure. Have a nice day."

"You too." I waved at her and headed back towards the booth. Mom was serving Chief Unser as I slid in beside her.

"Hey, Mika."

"Hey Chief, how you doing?" I smiled at him, grabbing a bowl of chilli and passing it along to Billie to give to the girl she was serving.

"Who's that guy behind the grill?"

I looked up at mom's voice and followed her gaze. There was a guy behind the police stand, dressed in slacks and a shirt.

"That's our new best friend, Agent Kohn. ATF."

Mom looked at Unser in shock and I stared at the man.

"Where the hell is Clay?" Mom muttered. I spotted Tig and Bobby striding towards the exit with a purpose, Jax beside them. "Fuck no."

Mom strode out of the booth and stopped Jax with a solid smack on the chest. I whistled loudly and laughed, ducking out to join them.

"… now he's taking all my man power."

"Who's that guy with the cops?"

"That's your ATF guy."

"That guy was at the hospital last night, watching me with Abel."

Mom and I exchanged looks as Tig voiced what we were all thinking.

"That's dangerous, brother."

"Shit."

"Well you keep an eye on him."

I zoned out of the conversation, staring at the guy who was now returning my gaze as he calmly drank from a plastic cup. The boys left and mom and I stood for a few minutes, just watching the cop stand.

"This isn't gonna end well." Mom muttered. "I can feel it in my bones."

I nodded in agreement, following her back to our own booth.

The club house was quiet when I approached, walking slowly as I listened to my IPOD. There were no mechanics running around, no crow eaters or friends of the club. I stopped just outside, feeling something cold trail down my spine… fear.

"Dad? Jax?" I called, stepping inside quietly. I held my gun at my side, my finger lightly on the trigger as I stepped further inside.

"Mika? What the fuck are you doing here?" Dad stepped into the main room and scowled at me. I noticed some of the other guys behind him, exchanging looks and I slid my finger off the trigger, snapping the safety back into place.

"You gave me a fucking heart attack." I accused him, locating the bag mom had sent me for and grabbing it. "What the fuck is going on?"

"Nothing baby. Just came back from getting some Chinese food." Dad assured me. He pushed me inside a little and I saw Karl surrounded by the rest of the club.

"How'd it go with the Chinese?" Piney asked.

"Not too good." Jax replied.

"Well where's Chuckie?"

"Who's Chuckie?" I asked.

"Well that's the upside." Dad grinned.

Karl took a step towards him, holding his hand out in greeting. Dad kept one arm around my shoulders and held his beer in the other.

"Clay, it's good to see you man."

"So I hear you got an offer I can't refuse."

"Something like that." Karl chuckled.

"Well, I better get back to the fireworks or your mom's gonna be stuffing gun powder up my ass." Opie announced.

"Yeah, I'm sure we're all on Gemma shitlist by now." Jax smirked.

"I live on that shitlist." Dad announced. "Mika, go with Opie."

"Sure thing." I replied. I grabbed the bag again and headed towards the hallway Opie and Jax had just gone into, ignoring the heavy stare I felt on my ass as I left.

"I'd rather be dead than that guy."

"Yeah, me too."

I raised an eyebrow at their conversation but didn't ask.

"You ready?" Opie asked me. "We can take my bike."

"Sure," I smiled. "But don't tell Juice."

Opie grinned and grabbed the bag off me, carrying it outside.

I took if from him once I was situated on the bike, keeping it on my wrist as I slipped my arms around Opie's waist.

It was dark when we got back to the fair and I bid Opie farewell as I looked around for mom. Someone was on stage announcing ballot winners as I stowed mom's bag behind the now empty chilli stand.

I looked around the yard, taking in the band on the stage briefly before looking for mom. I saw her talking urgently to Opie and was about to make my way towards her when I saw her shake her head and make her way into the now dancing crowd. I watched, from the side, as she stood next to the dark haired woman from this morning, April. A few words were exchanged before April took off and mom finally caught sight of me. She motioned to the building and I followed her around the corner, where it was dark and quiet. Opie had started the fireworks display and I watched them in silence as mom smoked.

"He still had the back piece." Mom finally spoke. "He chose fire."

I felt my stomach begin to turn as I realised what she meant. Who the he was and what choosing fire meant. I closed my eyes against nausea but suddenly all I could see was Karl's back, red and black and blistered from the flame; skin falling off as he screams in agony and I rushed to the nearest trashcan, emptying the chilli I had eaten early.


	13. AK51 part 1

This is the next chapter! I have most of this episode written, just fine tuning it a little. This was a really difficult one for me to write and i don't know if its come across exactly how i wanted it to or if Mika really is just a huge bitch so let me know what you think!

As always, i don't own the characters and episodes apart from the originals.

"What time's dumbo gonna be home at?"

I looked up from my nail polish and shot Sean a dirty look. He slid into the seat next to me and grinned, unrepentant, as he opened his newspaper at the sports section. I ignored his question and continued to apply the dark colour to my nails, paying close attention to what I was doing to avoid mistakes.

"You hanging around for awhile? I thought you'd be at the club house, pestering your dad and Jax." Sean continued to talk as he read.

"Waiting on Billie. She's meeting your mom at the studio and I told her I'd give her a ride." I finally replied, throwing the bottle of polish into my bag and blowing on my nails. "She's showing the new girl the ropes. Plus Jax is busy, doing something with Piney." I made a face to show how bizarre that idea was and Sean laughed before rising to make a cup of coffee.

"You don't seem as... excited as I thought you would be." He commented.

I looked up from my nails and smiled. "Are you kidding? I can't wait til he gets back… in fact, I'm thinking of tying him up in my bedroom and not letting him out until he agrees to never leave again."

"Please spare us the details of your very deviant sex live, Mika." Billie laughed as she joined us. She swiped Sean's coffee cup, gulping it down in three drinks and then wincing. I chuckled and shrugged.

Juice was finally scheduled to come home today and to say I was excited was an understatement. I was waxed, buffed and moisturised so much that my skin actually felt like silk and I had a new dark green bra and panties set under Juice's favourite sun dress. I couldn't wait to see him again… despite the fact that Juice had the dirtiest mouth of any guy I'd ever been with, phone sex just wasn't the same as physical sex with him.

"You ready to hit the road, doll?" I asked Billie, carefully lifting my bag and coat with my still wet nails.

"I am. Sean, keep an eye on her. She's a nice kid but she ain't the sharpest."

"Oh yeah? Remind you of anyone?" Sean chuckled, shooting me a look. I picked up his now discarded newspaper and rolled it up, slapping it against the back of his head with a grin.

"One of these days, Sean my love, I am going to rip your balls off." I threatened.

"Promises, promises." Billie laughed again.

I dropped a kiss on Sean's cheek before leaving, waving goodbye to the girls left working in the café and heading towards my car. Billie lagged behind slightly, rapidly typing something into her phone.

Once inside the car she turned serious eyes on me.

"So, you ready for him coming home?"

I nodded. "I am."

"You ready for whatever he tells you, when he gets here? About Indian Hills and any…"

"He told me he hasn't done anything." I cut in. I took a deep breath and glanced over at her, taking in the worried look on her face. "And I believe him."

There was a few seconds of silence before Billie cleared her throat.

"Good. That's good, I guess."

"You guess?" I asked incredulously. "What do you mean you guess? You don't think I believe him or you don't think I should?"

"No, God, no nothing like that. Relax, Mika." She laughed easily and I relaxed a little. "I just wasn't expecting that to be your response. I was expecting to have to comfort you and convince you that he wouldn't do anything to risk it… you know he called me, right?"

I looked over at her and shook my head. We weren't far from Cara Cara but I swung my car into a small car park and killed the engine, turning towards Billie and giving her my complete attention.

"He didn't want me to tell you until he was home and shit but I guess now's close enough. He called a few times, wanted to make sure you were doing okay with him being gone… wanted to make sure that I knew he wasn't doing anything. I guess he figured that if he made sure I knew, I'd make sure you knew." She grinned a little. "He's really not as stupid as he makes out, huh?"

"Not even close." I confirmed. "He may not have the common sense that the rest of us enjoy, but he's not stupid."

Billie nodded slowly, still smiling. "He's crazy about you, Mika. Absolutely over the fucking hill crazy. He was so worried that I don't think he'd be able to get it up for a sweet butt even if he'd been so inclined."

I laughed at her words and felt my shoulders lighten.

The truth was that I had been a little worried about what Juice would reveal about Indian Hills when he came home. Sure, we spoke every night and he assured my that my voice and his right hand was all he needed while he was away but deep in my gut I was convinced he was lying. But listening to Billie recount her conversations with him made my entire body lighten with relief. He wouldn't go to so much trouble to convince me he was being faithful if he was planning to stray, not after I basically gave him free reign to do so.

But with that thought came the guilt. Every time I remembered accusing him of not being faithful on other runs, the way I'd spoken to him before he left Charming, so sure that he'd cheat on me, made me feel more ashamed than I'd ever felt before. I could see his dark eyes, always so fucking expressive, staring into my lighter ones, trying to convince me that he was telling the truth.

I didn't like the feeling but every time it hit, I swore to myself that I'd never accuse him again, never doubt him again… or at least I'd try not to.

"You okay?" Billie touched my arm softly.

I nodded with a grin. "Yeah… I just can't wait to see him, you know?"

She nodded. "I get it… alright, Mika, time to take me to porn central."

I chuckled and put the car into gear again, speeding towards Cara Cara.

After dropping Billie off and exchanging a few bits of gossip with Luanne, I headed towards the garage. I wasn't sure what time Juice would be home but I wanted to be there when he got there. I had already warned dad that he was mine as soon as he told him everything important and he'd grinned and nodded.

The garage was busy when I pulled in. My usual spot was taken by an unfamiliar car and I scowled briefly before pulling into the spot beside it and climbing out.

I waved lightly to Tig and Chibs across the yard and headed towards the office. Kip was wandering in the same direction, looking a little lost as he looked around.

"Hey Sack." I greeted him as I fell into step beside him. Jax and dad were walking towards the office too, from the opposite direction but they didn't notice us.

"What's up, Mika?" He grinned shyly. I returned the gesture and hooked an arm through his, pulling him to a stop a good bit away from the office.

"You alright? You've been a little weird since you came back from Indian Hills." I commented. It was true; he'd been quiet and a little withdrawn from the other guys, especially my dad, and it was only a matter of time before they called him on it. "You get some kinda STI up there?"

He smiled a little at my joke and shrugged. "Nah, just a little stressed I guess. Someone's been flushing panties down the toilet and the whole thing's backed up. Fucking disgusting."

I scrunched my nose up in disgust as I felt bile rise in my throat.

"Jesus, I just don't get some people."

"I know, right." He commented. We started off towards the office again and I frowned as Dad held a warning finger out to Kip as he passed us.

"What was that about?" I muttered. Kip didn't answer, just dislodged himself from my grip and approached mom. I hung back a little, watching him as he asked for a phone number.

"Thanks… you look real nice today, Gemma."

My eyebrows shot up at his remark and I met my mom's eyes over his head as I bit back laughter.

"Looks like your boy's home." Mom commented as I came to stand beside her. I whirled around, looking over at the truck I hadn't noticed. My heart sped up and I didn't need a mirror to know that I was grinning like a fucking fool.

"Who the fuck is that?" I muttered as a tiny girl dropped down from the passenger seat just as Juice climbed out of the driver's seat. She looked around, shielding her eyes with her hands as she surveyed the yard. "Seriously, who the fuck is that?"

"Come inside, baby." Mom's voice was soft as she pulled me into the office before Juice could see me. She kept a strong hand on my shoulder as I pushed the blinds up.

I watched from the window as dad and Jax approached him, dad grabbing him by the neck and pushing him. The girl ran up and separated them, talking up to my dad. The angry look on my dad and Jax's face sealed the deal... Juice had brought this fucking whore home with him and they were as pissed as I was.

Everything I had said to Billie went out the window as I took the bitch in.

She was small, but pretty, dressed in tiny shorts and a vest. She stood comfortably beside Juice as he touched his neck wearily and looked around… stood next to him as if she'd been around him for awhile, as if she belonged there. I felt rage slowly bubble in my stomach, making it churn with nausea.

I had trusted him; taken him at his word and gone against everything I had believed when he swore he wasn't having sex with anyone but here he was, standing next to a fucking gorgeous whore who was talking to my dad and my brother like she belonged here. Jax smacked Juice across the head as he left and I felt my stomach turn as Juice then grabbed her arm and tugged her. I was such a fucking moron.

"I have to get out of here." I muttered. Suddenly the office was too small, too constricted. I had to get out of there before I either threw up or fainted.

"Go through the garage." Mom told me, still watching the scene with a strange look on her face. "But Mika, maybe you should talk to him first..."

I shook my head violently and followed only her first bit of advice advice, walking briskly and keeping my head down. I ignored the greetings I received from the mechanics and Sons that I passed, heading for my car.

"Mika!"

His voice was warm and I felt my steps falter. My car was so close but I'd never make it without him catching up. I slowed my steps slightly but didn't turn as I felt the tears slide down my face. Let him catch up, I decided. We'd have to deal with each other eventually so why not now, while I was hurt and pissed? Let him see the fucking damage he inflicted. How dare he come and talk to me, so soon after leading that bitch out? How fucking brazen did he have to be to go from her to me in my father's fucking garage?

"Oh baby, I missed you." He wrapped an arm around my stomach from behind, tugging my into his hard body and tightening his grip. He face found my neck and I shivered as his breath hit the sensitive skin. "Way too fucking long... missed you so much and need you so fucking bad."

I pulled away and turned to face him. We were almost at my car now, far away from the office that no one would hear the fight and I closed those last few steps between me and freedom.

"Why are you crying?" Juice asked, his fingers wiping the tears off my cheeks. His grip tightened on my face and he scowled darkly as he looked down at me. "Did someone do something to you? Who was it?"

"You." I hissed, pulling away angrilly. I shoved his hands away from me and ignored the hurt look that crossed his face. His hands hovered in mid air, as if he were unsure of what to do with him now that I'd pushed him away. "What did you think would happen, huh? You think you could bring home some fucking whore and I'd be okay with it? What, were you going to alternate us? I get you every other fucking night?"

"What are you talking about? What whore? Cherry?" He looked confused but I ignored the expression, so caught up in my anger and the dull ache in my chest.

"You're fucking kidding me. Cherry? Is she serious?" I let out an amused chuckle as I saw her approach us slowly from behind him. She was watching me nervously, turning back every few seconds to look at the office before returning her gaze to me. She was almost at us and she held a hand out in our direction.

"Look, lady, you got the wrong idea here." She spoke slowly and I raised an eyebrow. "We never…"

"Save it." I cut her off. "I really don't give a fuck about anything you have to say."

She looked vaguely insulted but I was just getting started. Juice's hand felt like fire on the skin of my arm and I shook him off again, opening my car door with my arm behind my back so that I could face the two of them.

"Mika, I swear…"

"You're trash." I told Cherry. "Nothing more. Now I'm not entirely sure why he brought you back, because we have plenty of trash here, and hell some of it's a lot prettier and a lot classier than you. But hey! Just stay the fuck out of my way."

"Look, I don't know who you are or what your deal is but I'm outta here."

"Where you gonna go?" Juice asked, taking a step towards her. That was the last straw and I climbed into the car, slamming the door loudly.

"Mika, wait a second…" Juice held a hand out to me. "Cherry, where are you gonna stay?"

"I'll find somewhere." She smiled at him and I felt my stomach curl in disgust once again.

"Well, this has been fun but I need to go vomit now." I told them with a sarcastic smile. "Juice, get the fuck out of my way or I'll run you over."

"No, not until you… fuck! Mika!"

He jumped out of the way as I reversed, the tears in my eyes making it difficult to see.

I peeled out of the garage, fighting every urge to look in the mirror, and headed for Cara Cara.


	14. AK51 part 2

In honour of the new season and my recent purchase of season 2 on dvd!

hope you all enjoy, please read and review.

Cara Cara was crawling with half naked men and women when I stepped inside. I had placed dark sunglasses over my eyes to hide the evidence of the crying I had done by the side of the road on the way here but I knew my blotchy skin and husky voice would give it away anyway.

I ignored the whispers as I passed the girls dressed in school uniforms, standing and talking in groups as I made my way across the set. There was no one familiar around I let out a dejected sigh as I wandered into an empty hallway.

I ran into Luanne as I was looking for Billie and one look at me had her wrapping her arms around me in a tight hug. Her tenderness and the worried look on her face had me resting my suddenly heavy head on her shoulder and sobbing again.

"Oh, baby, it's okay. Your mom and dad will work this through, don't worry." She soothed me with a hand stroking up and down my arm. "These things happen and your mom, in her condition right now... she just reacted a little more violently than she usually would but she'll be fine... they'll be fine."

"Huh? Is my mom here?" I asked. The last person I needed to see right now was my mom. I didn't need her speech about what happened on runs right now. I knew the rule about what happens on runs stay on runs and although I had told Juice that it would be okay to fool around with a nameless, faceless whore, I had not given him the right to bring him home to my fucking town and flaunt them in my fucking face.

"Sure, she's just in the bathroom. Billie's already gone home. I think she's got a hot date but she wouldn't tell me anything."

I nodded slowly and untangled myself just as my phone buzzed in my pocket for what had to be the fifteenth time since I'd left TM. I didn't really want to read anything he had to say, any more than I wanted to hear that soft, sexy voice he saved for me... and for Cherry too, probably. I sighed and bid Luanne good bye with a hug, assuring her I'd be fine, before heading back towards the exit and stepping into the blazing afternoon sun.

Mom was standing next to her car, smoking as she stared up at the sky. She glanced at me as I approached, shaking her head as I leant next to her. She took another draw of the cigarette and blew it out slowly before looking at me.

"Well, baby, you can relax. Juice never touched the skinny bitch." Her voice was hard and tinged with bitterness but I felt my heart jolt a little as her words sank in.

"What? How do you… no fucking way."

The look she gave me said that yes, my dad had fucked the skinny bitch that had to be my age, at the oldest. Suddenly the rage burned in my stomach again, this time directed at both my dad and myself, altough i tried to ignore the latter for the time being. I looked at mom carefully before speaking again.

"Is he fucking insane? What the hell is she doing here? Why did Juice bring her?"

Relief raged with guilt and grief inside me as I looked at mom. She was seriously hurting and I didn't know how I could help because ten minutes ago I had been the same way and no one would have been able to help me. Plus, my mom was the strongest person I know and she never, ever showed vulnerability. I knew she wouldn't want me to make a big deal out of this but all I wanted to do was wrap an arm around her and let her cry into my shoulder. The confusion must have shown on my face because I suddenly felt mom's hand on my shoulder and I looked up at her.

"You okay?" She asked me as she threw the remains of the cigarette on the ground.

"Me? I'm… I dunno. I accused Juice of fucking her and bringing her home and I told her she was nothing more than trash. I told him to… God, I was such a bitch. I tried to run him over!"

Despite the fact I knew she was hurting and despite the fact that I now had a huge pit of guilt in my stomach we started laughing at the thought. I held my sides as I cackled and mom leant heavily on the car as she chuckled. It was cathartic, standing together and laughing over something that was causing both of us intense pain.

"Baby, go to the club house." She told me when we had calmed down. "Talk to him, make him understand why you tried to kill him. You make damn sure that when you get home tonight that the only thing on his mind if you. Just you, not some skinny ass whore who'll go down on anyone with a cut and a fucking bike."

"Where are you going?" I asked after a few minutes of bitter silence.

"I got some errands to run, things to pick up. I'll be fine, I'm just… a little hormonal." There was a note of shame in her voice and I smiled softly. Sometimes my mother forgot that she wasn't super human.

"Mom, you know that it happens to all of us, right? Even the skinny little bitch is gonna go through it some day and she'll probably be a hell of a lot worse off because she doesn't have a son and daughter who would do anything for her and a husband who would fucking kill for her."

Mom looked at me seriously before pulling me into her and kissing my forehead firmly. She held me for a brief few seconds and I grinned, knowing that her hormones must be seriously fucked up if i was getting hugs and kisses in the car park of a porn business.

"I love you baby. Now go get your boy back." She told me firmly. She took another cigarette out of the pack and lit it, leaning against her car again and turning her face back towards the sky.

"You'll call me if you need anything?" I asked. She nodded in agreement and I sighed.

"I don't know where to even fucking start…" I muttered as I climbed into my car.

As I drove towards home I recalled the hurt look on Juice's face when I pushed him away and the utter confusion when I accused him of fucking her. I was such an idiot. The concern for her when she was leaving… Juice was a nice fucking guy, it was part of his charm, and he didn't want her to end up on the streets. How could I be so stupid? How could I be so nasty and so quick to accuse him? I knew he loved me… I had no doubt of that at all so why was I always so quick to think the worst of him. My own pathetic self doubt and insecurities were maybe going to cost me the best thing in my life.

I raced home, my mind spinning back and forth from the excited look on Juice's face as he jumped down from the trailer to the hurt confusion when I had yelled at him. By the time I turned the corner on my street I had tears rolling down my face again.

How was I possibly going to be able to make it up to him? As soon as the thought crossed my mind, another followed; slower and more careful than the previous thought, this one took hold at the back of my head and seemed to cling there, even as I shook my head to dislodge it. I couldn't do it... or could i?

It was a big fucking step and one that, up until five seconds ago, I was so sure I wasn't ready for. But what if I was? What if I was putting myself off simply because of fear and the pathetic insecurities running through my brain constantly. I mean, was there ever going to be a day when I woke up and decided hey, I'm totally ready now? The idea was ridiculous. I would be no more ready in six months than I was right now. So was I ready?

When I thought about it, really thought about it, I couldn't picture my life without him in it. I was so fucking sure we were the real deal, like my mom and dad were the real deal. Sure, they were going through some shit but I knew they'd get past it.

I realised what a hypocrite it made me to dismiss this so easily when it came to mom and dad but to make such a huge deal out of it when it was me and Juice but I couldn't help it. I knew mom would forgive dad, knew that it was the mess of hormones inside her that was making her react like this. Sure, the little bitch shouldn't be here but mom had never seemed to have any problem with the on the run rule before and once she and dad sat down and talked about it, they would be fine. They had to be fine.

Like Juice and I would be… once I set my plan in motion.

I took another deep breath and lifted my phone. There were sixteen messages and ten missed calls. All the calls were from Juice and the majority of the messages were too, ranging from confused to hurt to annoyance and back. One simply said _I love you baby, please call me back._ One message was from Jax to tell me dad had been picked up by ATF for questioning and another was from mom, telling me that she was about to be arrested for smacking Cherry across the face with a skateboard.

Suddenly my phone lit up with a number I knew to be the Sheriff's office and I couldn't help but chuckle as I hit answer.

"A skateboard, mom? Really? Where did you even get one?"

"It seemed appropriately high schoolish." She replied dryly, ignoring my last question. "This is my one phone call."

"Okay… do you want me to call Rosen?" I asked, tapping my fingers along the steering wheel. "Or do you want me to come post bail?"

"Neither. I'm calling you to see if you're with Juice yet? How's that going? Oh, and your dad's here as well."

"Yeah, Jax sent me a message earlier about that and I just read it. I'm not at the club house yet so I haven't talked to him. Mom, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, baby. I just… I need a little time to think. A little quiet time. So don't come and post bail, alright. I'll be home tomorrow."

"What? Mom, I'm not letting you stay in the cells overnight. Let me post bail and you can come and stay with me…"

"Mika, baby, it's fine. I'm fine, don't worry about me. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Mom-" She had hung up and I stared at my phone in disbelief. It had been years since my dad had been arrested and I couldn't remember mom ever being arrested and now both in one day? My head was spinning as I picked up the phone again, scrolling down my list of contacts until I found the number I was looking for.

"Mika? What's wrong?" The raspy voice greeted me after a few rings.

"Nothing's wrong… I just… you're in town, right?"

"I'm in a motel just outside. Jax called and told me to delay our arrival. Something 'bout ATF and Clay getting arrested. Did something else happen?"

"You mind if I come for a visit?" I asked, ignoring his question completely. I bit my lip as I waited on a response.

There was silence on the other end for a few seconds.

"You sure everything's okay?" His voice had deepened a little with worry and I smiled slightly.

"Yeah, I just need a favour. So can I come?"

"Of course. I'll meet you at town limits in fifteen."

"I'll be there."

I started the car back up before I could change my mind and put it into drive. I passed the garage out of habit and slowed as I passed. I could see Tara's car a little up ahead, taking the turn towards the hospital, and frowned in confusion before glancing sideways and cursing loudly. The guys were on the ground, in a row, while feds in armour stood over them. I couldn't make out faces or expressions but I could see Jax's blonde hair and Juice's mohawk side by side. I briefly debated pulling in, just to see what was happening, but changed my mind when a few other cops strolled out of the club house.

"What the fuck is going on?" I muttered as I sped up again, just as one of the feds swung his head in my direction.

There was a lone rider parked by the side of the road as I reached the outskirts of town. I raised a hand in greeting and he nodded in my direction. I followed him towards a small motel a few miles outside of Charming and parked my car beside his bike. I took a deep breath before stepping outside of the car, my heart now pounding a loud beat against my chest as I looked up at the biker waiting on me. He had dark glasses covering his eyes and his usual serious, scary expression on his face as he watched me carefully.

It took a few minutes before I finally climbed out of the car, smiling up at him and nodding in greeting once more.

We were silent as we walked inside, and I watched as he walked around, switching the lights on and closing the curtains against the late afternoon sunlight.

"So, Mika, what can I do for you?" Happy asked with a small grin.


	15. AK51 part 3

The lot at Teller Morrow was eerily quiet when I pulled into it, hours later. There were no bikes, no cars except for the ones left idle by costumers. The clubhouse was lit up but there was none of the usual noise spilling out of it.

My phone had died an hour ago and I had no idea if mom and dad were still in lock up or if they'd been released. I still wasn't even sure why dad had been arrested in the first place. Juice had stopped calling hours ago, after one final, angry message on the voicemail and no one else had tried to reach me while I was with Happy. I had no doubt he'd told Jax where I was so that he wouldn't worry.

I stopped halfway to the clubhouse, suddenly realising that I had no idea who was inside. Mom and dad had always warned me to be careful, and safe, and with that in mind I pulled my gun out of my bag, holding it tight against my leg as I pushed open the door.

"Holy fucking shit."

I froze in the doorway of the club house, looking around at the mess before me. Chairs were upturned, broken glass all across the floor and bottles lying across the bar, spilling various alcoholic liquids on the ground. The pool table had been over turned, and the balls were scattered around. Posters, pictures and everything else that could be ripped up were, the torn shreds littering the floor.

"Holy. Fucking. Shit." I repeated. There was no sign that anyone was here and I felt my heart flutter with panic.

"What the fuck happened?" I muttered aloud, stepping further into the room and letting the door slam behind me. I jumped a little at the loud sound in the silence before throwing my bag and coat onto the only remaining clean spot on the bar and grabbing a trash bag from nearby.

"What the fuck are you – Mika."

I jumped at the voice before turning to come face to face with Juice. He had his gun in his hand, held steadily with the trigger on my face, just as mine was pointed at him. We looked at each other in silence for a few seconds before I put my gun back into my bag and he tucked his back into his waist band.

He was dressed in baggy pants and a black vest, the muscles on his arms clearly defined by the sheen of sweat the covered them. I took in the view for a few seconds before coming to my senses again.

"Juice, what happened? Are you okay? Where the fuck is everyone? Did the feds do this?"

He picked up a brush and began brushing up the glass on the floor, not looking at me as he did so.

"Yeah, they trashed the place. You should see the bedrooms. Sack's at the hospital making sure Cherry doesn't talk about the skateboard and the rest of the guys are up at the cabin, figuring out what's gonna happen with Piney's old Army buddy."

"So you got stuck with clean up, huh?"

"Well I'm not exactly in anyone's good books right now, am I?" He sounded so much more bitter than I'd ever heard him before and I felt my stomach clench and tears well up in my eyes again. This was all my fault.

"Juice…" I reached a hand out blindly to him but he shrugged me off.

"No. I can't do this right now, Mika. It's been a long fucking day and I have all this shit to clean up. Go home and we'll talk tomorrow, maybe."

"Juice…" I started again. He ignored me, continuing to brush up the glass. I took my trash bag and began picking up the plastic cups and busted cans from the floor. When I had done that I moved to the pool table, pushing it over again.

"Mika, what are you doing?" Juice finally asked. I could feel his eyes on me the entire time I was picking up trash but he hadn't spoken and I'd allowed him that because I knew he was hurt – and that it was my fault.

"I'm helping you. And then you're coming home with me and we're going to talk."

"About what? About how much you don't trust me? About how you tried to run me over this morning, without listening to anything I had to say? We gonna talk about where you've been all day? Why you haven't been answering calls or messages?"

"Juice stop!" I cut him off. His eyes were angry as they glared down at me and I sighed. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm so fucking sorry for not listening to you. I just – "

"You just what? You just saw her and assumed that I'm a big enough dick to bring a sweet butt home to rub in my old lady's face? Seriously, Mika, do you not know me at all?" He threw the brush down and I winced as it hit the floor with a loud bang. "God, this morning started out so fucking well. I was getting to come home, getting to see you again and I was so fucking excited. I was gonna grab some DVDs and a take out and you and me could've spent the next few days in bed but no. You had to fucking ruin that by acting like a psycho."

"I do know you." I spoke softly, leaning against the pool table and wrapping my arms around myself. He stood in front of me, still watching with those cold eyes, and I shivered. "I know you wouldn't hurt me, J… but when I saw her. She's just so fucking pretty and I couldn't blame you if you wanted someone else. I'm insecure, I'm petty, I'm a fucking bitch. I've got issues and I can't expect you to deal with them as well…"

"Yeah, you can. You're my old lady, Mika. You think this is some kind of… whim or something'? That I'm gonna get sick of you and pass you on for some whore who's fucked every other member of the club? You gotta know it isn't, baby. Me and you are the real deal. And you being a bitch is part of your charm. I like it as much as you like me being the dumb one in the club."

"You're not dumb, Juice, so stop it." I snapped. I hated hearing him put himself down like that, so easily as if he believed it. "And I'm sorry. I just panicked when I saw her and when I saw how dad and Jax reacted I just assumed that it was because you'd fucked her in Nevada and they knew."

"I told you on the phone I hadn't gone near anyone…"

"I know and I swear to you, Juice, that up until I saw her get out of that truck I believed you. I still believe you. I just…"

"Panicked, yeah you said that. The only reason I brought her here is because she's into Sack. I figured if he had his own girl to play with he'd stop being obsessed with mine. Plus she refused to leave the truck and I couldn't throw her out."

"You're a good guy, Juice." I told him with a soft smile. "Probably too good for me."

"Stop with the pity Mika, it doesn't suit you." He sighed and rubbed a hand over his head. "Look, what this comes down to is whether or not you trust me. If you don't, and you react like this every time I go on a run, I can't do this. I would do anything to be with you. I'd fucking kill for you, baby. So you need to decide what you want."

He made a move to turn away but I grabbed his arm and tugged him to turn him back to me.

"I decided hours ago." I told him softly. I slowly unbuttoned my cardigan, smiling as his eyes glazed over and he followed the movement. Once I was done, I threw the shirt behind me on the pool table. I took a deep breath, trying to ignore the hammering in my heart as my hands move to the bottom of my dress. I was going to do this, here in the clubhouse. I was going to prove to him how much I loved him. I was going to ignore the fact that any second, the other guys could return and find us.

"Close your eyes." I whispered, my hands resting on the hem of my dress. He did as he was told, placing his hands on either side of me on the pool table. I tugged the dress over my head, tossing it behind me.

"Open your eyes Juice." He opened them, running them over my face for a few seconds before dipping them lower. I heard his intake of breath when he saw the tattoo.

"Baby?" He asked softly, running his fingers little over the crow, above the cling film.

"I knew I had to do something to make this morning up to you." I told him. "And now seemed as good as any to get the tat. Happy's staying in a motel just outside of Charming, he did it. I love you Juice, and I trust you. I want to be your old lady and..."

He cut me off by pressing his lips to mine, hard. His fingers tightened on my hips, lifting me until I was sitting on the pool table, my legs around his waist.

"Mine." He muttered in my ear before slipping the lobe into his mouth. I groaned loudly at the sensation, little sparks of electricity dancing along all my nerve endings. His lips continued their path down my neck and then across my collarbone.

"I like these…" He murmured, slipping his fingers inside the panties I had gotten, just for him. I gasped at the contact, tightening my arm around his neck. "And this." His warm hand palmed my breast briefly before he took a step away from me. I groaned at the loss of heat and sensation but he soothed me by tugging his shirt over his head.

"Has to be hard and fast, baby." He warned me softly, a smirk playing on his full lips. "Shut up and fuck me, Juice." I demanded.

He left his jeans at his knees, stepping between my thighs again and tugging my panties to the side. I arched my back as he pushed inside me, scraping my fingers across his shoulders and smiling at his hiss of mixed pleasure and pain.

It was over quickly and I lay against him, breathing heavily against his chest as he supported both of us, I grinned.

"I can't believe you got the tat." He murmured against my hair. His fingers were stroking the sweaty skin of my back, up and down in a soothing motion that made my eyes heavy. "Let me see it again."

He pushed me lightly back onto the pool table, so that my legs continued to dangle off the side, and stood above me. The film over my tat had come over with the sweat and was lying across the table from me so his fingers were now brushing against the raw skin of my hip.

"It's so fucking beautiful." He breathed. "And it makes you mine."

"I was always yours, Juice. I didn't need a tat to tell me that." I told him with a grin. "Now hand me my dress. We gotta get this place into shape and then we'll go home and you can…"

"Do this all over again?" he muttered into the still bare skin of my shoulder as I rested against him again.

"Well, I was gonna say you could make me something to eat but sure, we can do that again." I chuckled. I tightened my grip on his neck and tugged his head so that he was looking at me.

"I love you." I told him. "And I may act like a bitch sometimes and I may be a little fucking insane but… I love you. And I'm your old lady."

"You are my old lady. And I love you too." He smiled.


	16. Old Bones1

I'm well aware of how much i suck at this updating thing. I am sorry it takes me so long and I will try to get it done faster in the future but I can make no promises.

Juice isn't in this episode and after watching the previous episode again, i couldn't see a reason why so i've made one up! if i've missed the reason, i apologise.

please read and review and thanks for sticking with the story!

The loud, shrill ringing of the phone pulled me out of the delicious dream I was having about me, Juice and the pool table in the club house.

I smiled sleepily as Juice groaned beside me at the sound, tightening the grip he had on my body and pressing his head against my side.

"Make it stop." He muttered, his breath warm on the skin above my ribs.

"Can't, you've gotten me in a death grip and the phone is where you threw it last night." I replied with a grin. From my vantage point above him I could see the lecherous smile that crossed his face.

"Mmm last night… let's have lots of repeats of last night." He suggested, sitting up suddenly. "Go get the phone and then come back to bed."

I laughed and forced myself out of bed, heading for where my bag was lying, upside down with all the contents on the floor, beside the kitchen table. The phone stopped ringing as I reached for it and I groaned.

"Who was it?"

I jumped as Juice's arm slid around my middle, his very naked front meeting my equally naked back.

"I thought you were waiting for me in bed?" I asked as I placed my phone on the table, not bothering to look at who the missed call was from. If it was important, they'd call back.

"I was. But then I thought about how nice it would be to have some morning sex… on the kitchen table."

"You know we eat at that table, right?" I asked, turning to face him. His hands gripped my hips, placing me on top of the table easily. He pushed between my legs and I responded by wrapping them around him tightly, crossing my ankles on his lower back.

"No we don't." He murmured against my ear. "We eat in the living room."

I chuckled and tightened my grip on his neck. He had just attached his teeth to my ear lobe when the phone began ringing behind me.

"No… no." I groaned as he pulled himself away, reaching around my to grab it. The action brought his hard body into direct contact with mine and I whimpered slightly at the sensation.

"It's your mom. If you don't answer she'll come over here and I don't want your dad to know that your mom's seen me naked. He'd kill me."

I huffed with annoyance before taking a deep breath and hitting the answer button.

"Why the hell didn't you answer my last call?" Gemma Morrow, always pleasant.

"Good morning to you too, mom." I retorted as I watched Juice head back to the bedroom. "I take it you've been bailed out?"

"Yeah. I'm at home now. Your dad came and got me this morning, everything's fine."

"What about biker Barbie?"

"Cherry? She's alright, I guess. She's here for the prospect."

"Oh, well as long as she has a good reason for being here, I guess we can forget about all the shit she caused, huh?"

"You and Juice make up?" Mom asked softly.

"Of course we did… speaking of Juice, I uh…" I was nervous suddenly, the phone sliding across my sweating palm as I held it to my ear. What would she say? Would she think I was stupid for getting the tat as a reaction to this? "I got the crow."

There was silence on the other end of the line for a few seconds before she started laughing. "About God damn time."

"I know, I know. Happy was heading into town last night and got a text to lay low until this shit with ATF cleared up so I went out to his hotel and he did it."

"So you're officially an old lady… I had actually given up hope on that ever happening." She chuckled again. "Anyway, I talked to your dad, convinced him that it was all his fault that you and Juice had a fight. He wasn't happy about accepting the blame but I made him see reason. He told me to tell Juice he had the next few days off. The two of you need to spend some time together, just the two of you. Especially now. But he needs to keep his pre paid on… just in case."

"Thanks mom." I smiled even thought she couldn't see me. "You and dad okay?"

"We're fine, baby. Be nice when you see him."

"Ha, we'll see." I laughed. "I love you mom."

"Love you too, baby."

She hung up and I stretched and yawned before heading back towards the bedroom. Juice was laying across the bed, his mouth hanging open and releasing soft snores. He was still naked and the morning sun was creating patterns on his smooth, tanned back.

I debating laying down beside him, just curling up against his warmth and taking advantage of the fact that neither of us had anywhere to be for the next few days. We could sleep for another few hours, then wake up and have more sex and then go back to sleep. It sounded like heaven.

The sensible part of me remembered that I had almost no food in the house and that I should go get some while Juice was sleeping. I didn't want anything as mundane as food shopping cutting into our time together.

I sighed again and grabbed clothes from the closet, dressing quickly and shoving my hair into a ponytail. I scribbled a note for Juice, sticking the post it to his head with a smirk, before jogging out to the car.

The market wasn't busy as I wandered slowly through it, distractedly throwing things in my basket without really paying attention. My mind was at home, still in bed with Juice.

I had expected to feel different once I had gotten the tat… I had always thought I'd feel suffocated or trapped but I didn't. Nothing felt different. I was the same Mika and Juice was the same Juice… except now I was his old lady. I would be tied to him for the rest of my life and rather than making me nervous, the thought made me smile. I was one hundred per cent his. When crow eaters came on to him in the club house, I had a reason to push them away. I had an excuse to smack them and say 'back off, he's mine'.

"Mika."

The smile quickly turned to a scowl and I swung to face the girl who'd spoken. She was dressed in shorts and a vest but her prettiness was diminished by the huge bruise that covered half her face.

"Biker slut Barbie." I retorted after looking her up and down, making sure that she saw the disgust on my face.

"Alright, I guess I deserve that." She admitted, shrugging.

"No, what you deserve is my fist through you face but this is the best market in town and I can't afford to get banned from it."

"Look, nothing happened between me and Juice. Nothing happened between anyone and Juice in Indian Hills. He was like a little lost puppy, every night in the corner of the bar with one beer and no chicks. Anyone who approached him were swiftly told to fuck off." She chuckled, as if we were best friends sharing a joke. I tried to keep my face impassive but her words had made my stomach bubble with happiness. Having someone confirm Juice's fidelity made me want to do a happy dance.

"This isn't about me and Juice." I finally answered her. I stopped putting items in my basket and turned to face her. "This is about the fact that you showed up at our garage yesterday, after fucking the president of the mother charter, without a single fucking worry about what kind of trouble it was gonna cause. My mom spent a night in a fucking cell because of you. Me and my boy had our worst fight yesterday, because of you. Are you getting my point?"

"Look, I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean to start any trouble, I didn't even think of Clay's old lady when I showed up. All I could think about was Kip."

"That's so sweet." I mimed vomiting and smiled at the annoyed look on her face. "But I don't care. I don't know why you sought me out, and I don't give a shit. Stay away from me and stay away from my family."

"I can't do that. I talked to your mom this morning and she said it was fine if I hung around for a while. I wanna make this work with Kip… I wanna be his old lady."

I looked at her seriously for a few seconds before shaking my head. There wasn't much I could do if everyone else had accepted her.

"Look, I love Half Sack." I told her. I saw the sudden shock in her face and smirked. "He's a good friend. If I find out you're not serious about this? If you even look at another guy, I'll break your pretty face."

I left her to think about it as I continued my shopping trip. She caught up with me again ten minutes later, in the freezer section.

"So, now that you've threatened me are we, like, friends?"

I shot her an incredulous look and she shrugged.

"I don't really know very many people here, you're the closest girl to my age. And Juice and Half Sack are friends, I just figured we could…"

"What, double date?" I laughed. "Look, I may not want to scratch your eyes out, but we're not friends. We're not even close. Civility is about the height of what to expect from me."

I made to move around her again but she caught my arm in a surprisingly tight grip.

"Come on, Mika. Kip told me I should try to talk to you, now that I'm gonna be hanging around for a while. We could at least see if we can be friends, right?"

"Look, Cherry." I started with a scowl but I knew my face softened as I took in her bruised face and hopeful look. "Alright, I guess we can give it a go but you should know, straight out, that I'm a bitch. I'm sarcastic and bitter and I can be mean."

"That's okay." She grinned. "It's just nice to be on this side of the rope for once, you know?"

"This side of the rope?" I asked in confusion. We had finally reached the check outs and I placed my basket on the counter.

"Yeah. I'm not a crow eater here, not someone to be looked down on. Your mom, the other guys… they're gonna accept me as an old lady."

"Don't you think you're getting a little ahead of yourself?" I asked curiously as I paid. "You're not an old lady yet."

"I know, but I'm gonna be. I can feel it." She smiled excitedly.

"If you say so." I popped the trunk of my car and slid the groceries in, before turning to face her. "You need a ride to the club house?"

"I'm not allowed to go to the club house." She scowled. "But could you drop me at Bobby's?"

"Bobby? What are you doing with Bobby?"

"They're training Kip for some bare knuckle fight thing and Clay told me I had to stay with Bobby for a while."

I thought about this as I drove, Cherry chattering on in the background. Could be a test, I decided. It was something dad would come up with. Get Bobby to hit on Cherry and see if she went for an actual Son, rather than a prospect. He was devious, I grinned.

I pulled the car to a stop outside of Bobby's house and waved at Cherry as she climbed out. Bobby opened the door as soon as she knocked and I waved at him with a grin before backing out onto the road again.

It was time to get back to my day off with Juice.


	17. Old Bones 2

Sorry for the prolonged absence. Here's the second part of the episode and hopefully i won't take so long in future. Please read and review.

i don't own any characters that you recognise.

All the blinds in the house were open as I pulled into the drive way. The front door was open and a classic rock station was playing as I carried the bags inside. Juice was in the kitchen, working out and singing along to STYX and I stopped to admire the view. He had put combats on but was still shirtless, and I smiled at the play of muscles in his arm and chest as he lifted the heavy weights.

I whistled loudly and he turned with a grin.

"You're back."

"Yep. I got food and shit to do us for the next few days because you and I? We're free!"

He looked at me in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"Dad has given you the next few days off and I'd booked them off when I found out you were coming home. So we have nothing to do… except each other."

I placed the bags on the counter and began unpacking, shrieking softly as his hands slid around my stomach. He placed soft, open mouthed kisses to the skin of my neck. He hands slid from my hips, under my shirt until they rested just below my breasts. His thumbs stroked across the tender skin, making me shiver against him.

"You smell like sex." He muttered. "Did you shower before you went shopping."

"Nope." I grinned, turning towards him. "You like the smell?"

"Hmm…"

The phone ringing made him groan loudly. "Someone does not want me getting laid today."

I chuckled, reaching towards the phone that hung up just outside the kitchen door.

"Hello."

"Hey, sis. I need a favour."

"What's up?"

"I drove Tara home from work and she told me about her ex. It's the ATF dick that's been following us. He was stalking her in Chicago, got a little violent so she got a restraining order against him. I bust his tire and warned him off but she's pretty shaken up. You think you could call her? See if she'll talk to you about it?"

"Why would she talk to me?"

"You're a girl, you're her friend, you're less likely to fly off the handle and kill the guy… pick a reason."

"Ugh, I was two seconds from getting laid on the kitchen counter, Jax ass." I griped, hanging up to the sound of his disgusted yells.

"What's up?" Juice asked. He had packed the food into the cupboards and was tossing vegetables into the fridge.

"Jax needs me to call Tara. See if she wants a little one on one girl talk." I groaned.

"A little one on one girl time with you and the doc?" His dirty smirk said it all. "I'm down with that."

"I'm sure you are, perv." I grinned as I slipped my vest over my head and tossed it out into the hall. "But this, right here," I pointed to my crow. "This means that the only one on one girl time you'll be getting, is with me."

I shrieked as he lifted me onto the counter, stepping between my legs.

"I can't believe you finally got it." He grinned. He contorted himself so that he could press a soft, open mouthed kiss to the skin of my hip. "I had seriously given up hope."

He looked at me with smiling, open brown eyes and I felt myself melt a little more.

"I had always planned on getting one, Juice. I just… I was nervous." I admitted. "But getting the crow was the best thing I've done in this relationship and I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner. I'm sorry I made you doubt me… fuck, I'm sorry I doubted you."

"I know how you can make it up to me." He smirked. I laughed as he unbuttoned his pants and dropped to my knees before him

.

"I thought I gave you the day off."

I looked up from locking my car to see Dad and Tig heading towards me.

"You did. Thought I'd stop by and see the kid. What are you two doing here?"

"Thanks to your boy, I got a Doberman bite on my ass and I think it's infected." Tig drawled. I narrowed my eyes at him and shook my head.

"I though you already had every infection known to man kind." I replied sweetly. Dad chuckled and Tig shot me a mock wounded look.

"That hurts, sweetheart."

"Sure." I snorted. "Seriously, why are you here? Who are you harassing?"

"No one, baby. We were in the neighbourhood so we stopped by to see Jax and Abel."

"Uh huh. I'll buy if for now, I guess." I sighed. "I'm gonna go, though. I told Juice I'd only be an hour."

"Alright, baby. Hey, Sack's gonna be doing some street fighting. You and Juice should come by."

I nodded and waved goodbye as I strode towards the hospital doors. I wasn't sure what I was going to say to Tara and was hoping she'd agree to come for coffee so we could talk in private.

"Mika," She sounded surprised to see me and I smiled. "What's up?"

"You got a break coming up? I wanted to talk to you about something." I asked casually. She looked at me and nodded slowly.

"Yeah, I guess. Can't leave the hospital but I can find us a private room to talk in."

"Great." I smiled and followed her, standing back a little as she spoke to the woman behind the desk.

"In here." Tara led me into a small family room, attached to an empty private room. "What's on your mind?"

"Tara, Jax told me." I blurted out. I had wanted to ease into the conversation but the words just spilled out.

"Mika…"

"No, listen. I get that you're scared and all that shit, and if you need anything from me to help, then I'm glad to. You ever wanna stay over with me, make you feel better, you just give me a call."

She was staring at me in confusion and I sighed. The next part was going to come across as harsh and I was sorry for that, but it had to be said and if not by me then by my mother… and it would end up a lot harsher.

"Tara, if this guy has followed you here and it hurts the club… no one is going to be happy." I put my hand up to stop her protests. "I know it's not your fault. I'm not saying it is… I'm just saying that you need to prepare yourself. If anything he finds or anything he does brings grief on us, there's going to be hell to pay. From a lot of different people. Now, you can deny it 'til you're blue in the fucking face but I know why you came back here. Finding out about Kohn just cemented it for me. You're here for Jax."

"Mika, please-"

"No, seriously. Listen to me, please. I get it. It's human nature when you're threatened. You go back to wherever you feel safe and for you, it's in Charming with the ex boyfriend who would do anything for you-"

"Mika, I didn't come back for Jax!" She yelled softly. I stopped talking and raised an eyebrow at her. "I didn't. I'll admit, I came home because he scared me. But I picked Charming because I have roots here, friends. I thought it would take him longer to find me… I assumed he'd look in the big cities first. I was hoping he'd think that Charming was too obvious. And I guess he did, for a while. But then he caught up with me. I wasn't even planning on telling Jax… or anyone. I was hoping the restraining order would hold but apparently federal business is more important than protecting innocent people from psychos. I get where you're coming from, Mika. But I'm not here to start trouble for anyone, least of all Jax."

We stared at each other in silence for a few minutes before I sighed and nodded.

"I'm sorry, Tara. I swear I didn't come here to attack you but it had to be said and I figured you would prefer if it came from me, rather than my mom."

She nodded and smiled slightly. "The resemblance between the two of you is remarkable, you know."

"Yeah. So, how are you holding up?" I had softened my tone and took a seat, prompting Tara to do the same.

"I'm fine, I guess. He's here for work, supposedly, but so far all he's been doing is following me. There's no point in trying to get another restraining order since the last one isn't holding. I don't know what to do other than getting on with my life and hoping that when he's done, he moves on."

"And if he doesn't?" I asked. She shrugged and looked down at her hands.

"I don't know… what would you do?"

It was a loaded question. I could see in her eyes that she knew exactly what I would do and she wanted to hear me say it… so she could call me on being a hypocrite. So I copied her shrug.

"I don't know."

She nodded with a small smile. "Yeah, I can see the likeness between you and Gemma. Crystal clear."

She went to leave and I put my hand on her arm to pause her.

"Tara, I may have said it like a bitch but I meant it. You need my help, I'm here. But try to keep Jax out of it… his head. His head's not in the right place right now. Not with Abel and Wendy and all the other shit that's been happening around here. I won't let you use him to take out your trash and then throw him away again, as soon as you're done with him."

Tara looked at me, shook her head and walked out.

"That could have gone better." I told them empty room before following her and heading towards the exit.

"Hey baby." Juice answered on the first ring. I climbed into the car with a grin at his satisfied tone.

"Hey. Sack's doing some sort of bare knuckle street fighting. Wanna meet me there?"

"Sure. I'll be there soon."

I nodded and smiled as I started the car. I may have fucked up a little with Tara but at least now she knew where I stood. And where she stood.


	18. The Pull 1

As always, the characters you recognise belong to Kurt Sutter.

* * *

"Abel's getting sprung today."

I snorted with laughter as I poured myself a cup of coffee, balancing my phone on my shoulder.

"Well there's an expression I'm gonna hear again in sixteen to eighteen years."

"You implying my grandbaby's gonna be a delinquent?" Mom asked sternly.

"Stands to reason. You're one, dad's one and Jax is one. If it looks like a –"

"Hold on, what are you? A saint?" She interrupted. I could hear her puffing on a cigarette and smiled.

"No, but I'm the only member of this family that hasn't been arrested for assault." I reminded her smugly.

"Only because that bitch you smacked around was too scared to press charges." Mom laughed.

"I have no idea what you're talking about but that whore deserved it. She had her scummy little hands down Juice's pants and wasn't taking no for an answer."

Mom laughed again and I could practically see the proud look on her face.

"What time?"

"Not til later. Doc's in surgery. Jax just left so I'm all alone. He tell you we had a fight about Tara last night?"

I froze, halfway between the door and the chair.

"No. What about?"

"Usual shit. He doesn't see that she's only here to get him back. Thinks it all in the past. I had to remind him that he was heartbroken when she left and I wasn't gonna let it happen again. You see her recently?"

My entire conversation with Tara flashed through my head and I winced. I was such a bitch. I had said what I needed to say but I had went about it in the wrong way.

"Nah, not in a few days." I lied. "Listen mom, call me when he's getting out and I'll come right over. I'm gonna get back to the mountain of paperwork I know you left me on purpose."

"You're better at filing than I am." She laughed before hanging up.

I chuckled quietly as I placed the phone back in the cradle. I tapped my fingers against the desk, staring down at the accounts book. The numbers meant nothing to me, they simply blurred before my eyes.

I had to apologise to Tara. I hadn't meant to offend her… well, I had. I just wanted her to know that she had to be careful about what happened with this Kohn guy. No one was going to look lightly on her getting the entire club into trouble. She came back for Jax and the last thing she needed was to be alienated by his entire family, all over some ex asshole.

Still, I cared about Tara. I always had. She was the closest thing to a sister, apart from Billie, I would ever get. In some ways, she was better than Billie. Billie and I were a lot alike, so much so that it often led to loud, screaming arguments filled with lots of swear words and biting remarks about things only the two of us know.

A few months before we started dating, Juice had walked in on one of these fights and had broken it up when he got in the middle and told Billie to back the fuck away from me. I had whirled on him, then, telling him not to get the in the middle and to never talk to my best friend like that. Billie had smiled and hugged me and the fight was over, leaving a confused and, I later found out, hurt Juice. He'd been trying to defend me and I'd turned my temper on him.

I smiled at the memory, remembering how glad I was that Billie had just laughed when I told her Juice and I were together. I'd been hoping that she would forgive him for the nasty way he spoke to her when we were fighting. She's simply shrugged and told me she was glad I had someone willing to defend me. She also suggested I warned him that the fights happened all the time and not to interfere next time, just in case he lost a vital bit of anatomy.

"Why are you giggling to yourself?"

I glanced up and smiled at Jax as he half sauntered, half limped into the office. He had a stack of paperwork in his hands and he dropped it on the table beside me.

"How's the leg?" I asked, pushing out a seat for him to sit in. He dropped and I could see the relief in his face. Like the rest of the family, Jax didn't like to show weakness. I had no doubt he'd been trying to hide the limp all day.

"Not bad. You hear about the kid?"

"Yeah, mom and I were just talking about what a little hellion he's gonna grow up to be." I grinned.

"Well if he's anything like his aunt." He teased and I smiled easily. "You gonna come to the hospital?"  
"Wouldn't miss it." I assured him. He took a deep breath and nodded.

"You know I appreciate everything you and mom's doing, right? Getting the house ready and going to visit the kid."

I nodded and smiled. "We're happy to help, Jax. You know that."

"Yeah, I know."

My phone ringing cut off whatever he was about to say next and he shook his head as he stood, dropping a kiss on my hair before striding out. He met Juice at the door and they nodded at one another in a manly way that made me grin. Juice closed the door behind him and took the seat Jax had just left, nodding towards my still ringing phone.

"You gonna get that?"

I shook my head as the phone stopped ringing and set it aside. It had been an unknown number so if it was important, there'd be a message.

"I was thinking you and me could do something tonight." Juice pulled my feet onto his lap and slipped my flip flops off. I sighed in happiness as his fingers dug into the sore flesh around my heel and smiled at him.

"What did you have in mind?"

"We could maybe go to that Spanish place you like."

"The one outside Lodi?"

"Sure."

"Sounds like fun. Has to be after Abel's sprung though." I grinned at him as he lifted my feet up slightly and kissed my ankle softly.

"Awesome. I'll give you a ride home from here and then we'll head to the hospital and go from there."

I nodded and accepted the kiss he dropped on my lips, groaning slightly as he sucked my bottom lip between his teeth.

"Get back to work." I told him with a smirk. I was rewarded with one in return as he saluted me.

"Yes mam."

* * *

The phone continued to ring for the next hour and I continued to ignore it. I didn't answer unknown numbers. I never had and I didn't intend to start now.

I was curious about who was so desperate to get a hold of me, though, and every time the phone rang, I stared at the screen, as if it held the answer.

Eventually I got tired of the ringing and switched it to silent mode, glaring at it every time it lit up and vibrated across the table. The paperwork was done, the filing all caught up and I was now bored, reading a first edition copy of Great Expectations Juice had gotten me as a birthday gift. I wasn't sure where he got it, or how, but it was an amazing gift and I'd giving him the blow job of his life as thanks. Afterwards, when we lay hot and sweaty and tired on the kitchen floor, he'd sworn to get me first editions for the rest of his life.

Just as I put the book down to go out and grab a drink the door of the office slammed open. I looked up and glared at Sean before taking in his appearance.

His face was redder than I'd ever seen it before and he was sweating. His hands were clenched by his sides and he was breathing heavily.

"Sean, what's wrong?" I asked, on my feet and moving towards him. His angry glare stopped me before I reached him but I glanced over his shoulder at the empty garage. It must be lunch time. The guys would be out in the yard, eating and joking and talking. Or in the club house, having a lunch time beer.

"You fucking bitch of a mother threatened my mom." He told me. His voice was raised, but not overly so. He pushed the door closed behind him and turned to face me again.

"But you already knew that, right? That's why you've been ignoring my phone calls all fucking morning."

He took a step towards me and I took one backwards. I had never seen Sean so angry. While Billie and I fought all the time, Sean and I never did. He was too easy going to argue with anyone. Having never faced his rage, I didn't know how to act. How to respond. Truth be told, I was a little frightened of the man in front of me.

"Sean, you need to calm down and tell me what happened. What calls? From the unknown number?"

He didn't answer for a few seconds, just glared at me with such hate that I actually felt myself shiver a little.

"God, you and your fucking family walk around like you own this place. The club needs money? Just go to the woman who's supposed to be your best friend and ask her for it. Threaten her if she has the balls to ask for interest. Your bitch of a mom called mine a greedy whore."

His index finger was inches from my face, his breath smelt of garlic and pot and some sort of sweet liquor.

"Hey, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about!" I tried to explain, pushing his finger out of the way but he just stepped closer.

"You people think you own this whole god damn town. My mom earned that money and you assholes don't get to ask for it. I don't give a fuck what you need if for. It's hers. It's not a fucking communal fund."

He was pulled away from me suddenly and I looked up to see Juice, holding something wrapped in a napkin. He had pushed Sean out of the way, stepping between us so that his back was to me. Protecting me.

"You got a problem with this club and it's business, you come to me."

Dad's voice was cool as he stepped into the office. Sean was still glaring, from me to dad to Juice and back and I still had no idea what was going on.

What did the club need money for and what the hell did it have to do with Luanne?

"You do not take it out on my daughter and you never speak to her that way. You never call my wife a bitch."

Sean just shook his head and turned to leave.

"You're all a bunch of assholes. We're supposed to be one big happy family, right? Families don't have hierarchies. Families don't threaten each other and they sure as hell don't treat each other the way Gemma just treated my mom."

He strode out of the club house and I winced as I heard the car squeal out of the yard. He shouldn't be driving in that state.

Dad and Juice were both looking at me and I stared back at them.

"What the fuck was that all about?" I asked flatly.

"Club needs money for the Irish." Dad told me after a brief pause. I nodded and gestured for him to go on. "Had the idea to ask Luanne for some. She's making enough out of her jizz business. Guess your mom wasn't very… delicate."

"Gee, dad, you think?"

I shook my head and turned my back on them both, not looking up until the door closed. I jumped as a warm hand settled on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry baby."

I let him pull me onto his lap. I didn't know who to be annoyed at. Mom for being… herself, I guess. Sean for taking it out on me? Or dad and the club for being in this predicament in the first place.

"You know when we were kids, the three of us swore this club would never come between us. No matter what happened, we swore. When Otto went away, they were pissed at me a little. Billie still hasn't fully gotten over it and every so often the resentment comes creeping out. Their dad's in jail and mine isn't."

I spoke softly, resting my head on Juice's shoulder as he stroked my hair back.

"I guess I was the only one who I actually meant it." I sighed. "If Sean is pissed, you can bet your ass Billie's worse."

"Not your fault, baby. Your dad's right. If they have a problem with what we do, then they can come and tell us. You're not a fucking punching bag for them every time something goes wrong. Otto knew what he signed up for when he patched in and Luanne knew when she became an old lady."

I nodded and continued to rest against him but my mind was spinning.

Both my best friends were pissed at me for something I had no control over. And I still didn't know what to do about Tara.

* * *

Well, what do you think? Let me know please!


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